The Great Christmas Record Odyssey, Ep. C

*cue elaborate fanfare*

We did it, folks.  100 Episodes of the greatest Holiday Vinyl review series on the World Wide Web (I assume - I doubt there's another asshole out there doing this.)

Because this is a special event (of sorts), I decided to mix things up a little bit with this installment.  It felt like too much of an honor for any shitty, old Christmas album pulled out of a dollar bin at a local record store to be scrutinized on this 100th Episode.  So, instead, I decided to re-evaluate a few of the past installments that were deemed acceptable enough to remain in my collection, but are now getting donated.

Bottom line is I'm running out of room in my Christmas Music crate - some of these mediocre LPs needed to be liquidated in order to make room for new additions later on down the road.  And, odds are, we'll be having another one of these mass-execution episodes in a few years - I can't just keep buying records and keeping them.  Kris would kill me.

So, without further adieu, here's the list of those old relics that are being taken out to pasture:

Album Title:  Remembering Christmas with the Big Bands

Album Artist:  Various Artists

Featured On:  Ep. 2 (Nov. 23, 2015)

Rating:  6

This album wasn't terrible, per se, but in the seven years since I reviewed this one I haven't put it on the turntable to listen to once.  Not once.  Jazz is one of those genres where you have to be in the right mood for it, and when that rare mood arises during the Holiday season when I feel like listening to jazz, I usually gravitate towards the likes of the Vince Guaraldi Trio, Sinatra, or Bing.  Sorry, Glenn Miller and Co., but the ship has sailed for you guys.

I'm sure there are thousands of World War II vets rolling in their graves over this decision, but whatever.

Album Title:  Your Favorite Christmas Music, Volume 4

Album Artist:  Various Artists

Featured On:  Ep. 6 (Dec. 1, 2015)

Rating:  6

Another perfect example of 'this is okay, but I have other LPs that are better.'  This compilation from the good people over at Firestone (seriously, what the f***) is fine example of contemporary '50s/60s music that was all the rage back in the day, but was over-shadowed by the counter-culture surge of Rock and Roll and 'the negro music.'  Traditional artists doing larger-than-necessary renditions of Christmas classics.  I honestly can't believe I gave this one a '6' seven years ago - had I reviewed this today it would probably be a '4' or a '5,' but back then I was new-ish at analyzing Christmas albums and was a little nicer when giving out scores.  Now that I'm a grumpy old man, I realize that this sounds like so many other boring Holiday albums I've reviewed over the years, and it has no business being in my record collection.

Sorry, (Mary Poppins.)

Album Title:  Enchantment of Christmas

Album Artist:  Various Artists

Featured On:  Ep. 10 (Dec. 8, 2015)

Rating:  7

This one is actually pretty good, and I don't have anything negative to really say about it - it's a great compilation of 50s/60s Christmas music.  Unfortunately, this version is in that VG/G+ range in terms of sound quality: no skips or pops, but some definite surface noise, and if I'm going to hold on to a record I want to make sure I have a decent copy of it.  More than that, however, is the fact that I already have every, last one of these songs on a multi-record, boxed set that's in NM condition, so owning this LP is, honestly, kinda redundant. 

Album Title:  The Little Drummer Boy

Album Artist:  The Abbey Chorale

Featured On:  Ep. 17 (Dec. 20, 2015)

Rating:  6

This one I felt bad about getting rid of at first, but then I realized the error in my ways back in 2015.  See, when I first reviewed this one, I wrongly assumed that this version of 'The Little Drummer Boy' was the definitive one - the classic one from the 1950's that everyone knows.  I can't be faulted too much for that, because it sounds nearly identical, but the version I was thinking about was the famous rendition by The Harry Simeone Chorale (1958.)  That (better) version I already own on an existing Holiday compilation, so there's no reason for me owning an album such as this if the only reason I'm doing so is because of that song.  The rest of the album is okay - like I said before, it's churchy, but done well - but I've rarely listened to it in the years since reviewing it the first time.  

I don't get the need to listen to church music very often (if ever), so this one's getting pitched as well.

Album Title:  What if Mozart Wrote Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas?

Album Artist:  The Hampton String Quartet

Featured On:  Ep. 22 (Dec. 1, 2016)

Rating:  6

I love Classical music, and I love Christmas music, so this one should be a knock out of the park, but it just doesn't work for me.  I've actually listened to this one on occasion since hearing it for the first time back in 2016, and every time I do so I get bored with it.  It's a cool enough concept in theory, but the execution doesn't leave one with feeling the Yuletide vibes at all.  Most of the songs on here require active listening in order to identify a familiar Holiday melody, and that kinda dampens this one on the ol' Fun scale.

Album Title:  A Merry Christmas to You

Album Artist:  David Rose and His Orchestra

Featured On:  Ep. 71 (Dec. 8, 2020)

Rating:  6

This is a pretty solid instrumental album, and sounds like the orchestral, backing music to any one of the countless '50s compilations I've reviewed in the past.  It sounds like the sort of music Sinatra or Bing sang over, and it's mixed well - great background music for the Holiday season.  That being said, this copy is in pretty rough shape, and I have other instrumental albums that I gravitate more towards during the Holiday season.  Like I stated originally, there aren't a lot of highs and lows on this album to keep the listener engaged:  the medleys keep things from getting too boring, but a lot of it starts to sound the same after awhile.  All in all, I'd recommend it for sure if a.) you have a decent copy and b.) don't have anything else similar in your collection.

Album Title:  Christmas with The Canadian Brass and the Great Organ of St. Patrick's Cathedral

Album Artist:  The Canadian Brass

Featured On:  Ep. 90 (Dec. 15, 2021)

Rating:  6

How this LP still works is beyond me - it's not bad at all, but it's not necessarily great either.  It's just okay.  Like all of the other albums in today's post, there's not a lot to complain about, but there are better options in my collection, and I have to trim fat from somewhere.  I held on to this one because of the sheer balls of the brass section - it's not a sound you hear often on a Christmas album, so last year I deemed it was worth holding on to.  I would probably still be holding on to it if I hadn't just had my socks blown off a few days ago when reviewing this similar-but-better, brass-heavy Christmas album.

VERDICT:  n/a (We bid farewell to a few mediocre installments from the previous seven or eight years that were once deemed good enough to remain in Holiday Rotation, but shall now walk The Green Mile in order to make room for new additions in the coming years.)

- SHELVED -

- Brian

Side-Project Shmorgasbord

Booya.

Finding oneself out of work for the week is an awesome, awesome thing. Granted, grad school still feels like work, and I generally do have a lot of crappy homework to do, but a week off is a week off. Its time for side-projects.

This week, I've got a couple things planned. Not necessarily major things, per se, but stuff that I've been wanting to do but haven't yet had the chance to work because of work and (get ready for it) grad school. Side-projects that are to be tackled this week include the following:

Long Ridge Writing. I've got to submit a story to these guys by the end of the month, so hopefully I can finalize this and mail it out before heading back into the school year. So far the writing program is working out real well, and its by far the coolest thing I'm doing right now... cross your fingers this stupid story thing gets finished this week.

Tattoo Design. Christ (brother, not spouse) and I are getting some ink done when I go home in December for Christmas. Initially we were going to get brother tattoos done with Jeff, but since Jeff is leaving for the Air Force in March, he can't get anything new done without messing up his enlistment (not sure how that works, exactly). So, in the meantime, Chris and I are getting separate work done. He's not sure what he's getting yet, but I know that I want our family's coat of arms and motto on the inside of my left arm, right above where I have my existing adinkra symbol from Ghana. I want to try and finalize the design before heading home, so a week off is the perfect time to do it.

Organize iTunes, iPhoto, and iEverything else. Yes, nerdery galore, but its necessary stuff that, while boring to hear about, keeps my sanity in place and my day-to-day sense of normalcy running as it should. Don't make fun of me.

Categorize Vinyl. I've been meaning to categorize my vast album collection, if only for insurance purposes - if there were a fire or something, I wouldn't know half of what to replace, and I've got some great, great pieces of music that are definitely worth saving.

I'll stop now, but that's just the tip of the iceberg in terms of what I have in mind for this break. I probably won't get half of it done, but its nice to aim high once and awhile. More than likely, I'll just end up sitting on the couch and decompressing in front of the TV between spurts of chasing the Cannonball around the house.

Let's do this.

- Brian

"Quality vs. Quantity," or "Why Don't People Buy My F&*%in' Stuff on Craigslist?!"

those of you who know me are probably already well aware of the fact that i love swords. i have no idea why i love them so much, but i do. i always have. there's no rationale behind this - i don't collect them for value, self-defense, or live-action role playing - i just seem to feel more happy in life when i'm surrounded by 1095 high carbon steel.

since i've got a kid now, i've tried to liquidate some of my armory assets and maintain a higher-level collection. for the last two years i've been trying to sell some of my cheaper, less-awesome swords over craigslist.org, but, alas, to no avail. my goal in selling these is three-part: i would essentially be a.) clearing the house of unnecessary (and dangerous) clutter that would appease the spouse and offspring, b.) obtaining extra revenue to go towards the purchasing of a select couple of higher-quality pieces, and therefore c.) creating a better collection to show off properly.

so far, to date, i've sold one, really cheap ninja katana for $20.

folks, if anybody has any ideas on how to better off-load these pieces, i'd love to hear 'em. ebay charges to much for listing fees and is bogged down by thousands and thousands of other people trying to sell similar items. craigslist is full of spammers, scam-artists, and people who don't hablo inglais and never pay up when they say they're going to.

here's what i'm selling....

1.) brass-handled falcata - $60

2.) decorative costume sword - $10

3.) civil war cavalry saber (replica) - $60

4.) tulwar shortsword from india - $50