Concerning Houghs

This epic chronicles the adventures of a Florida-turned-Michigan family of Midlanders, forged in theme parks and beaches and now freezing their collective butts off in the suburbs of Central Michigan. . .

Col. Brian J. Hough is an armchair historian, book and vinyl collector, beer lover, and ukulele enthusiast. He holds a chieftaincy title in a small West African village, co-founded the infamous Sausage Pad, and currently teaches 8th grade U.S. History. He thinks very highly of Indiana Jones, collects swords whenever he travels, enjoys a good pipe, and happily accepts all dueling challenges.

Kristina Hough serves as an office manager at a local dental office, where she enjoys dealing with the everyday stupidity of people on a daily basis. In her spare time, the Grand Mom oversees social outings, church functions, child obligations, and all daily household operations with an iron fist. She has been known to balance budgets, spend too much on nails, yell at electronic devices, and stretch the same four ingredients through six or seven different meals on a weekly basis. She enjoys sleeping a great deal.

Alayna Renee, the Cannonball, is our resident Junior, known primarily for staring at her phone, wearing jeans with too many holes in them, yelling at her sister, and ignoring simple instructions. She is legendary for moving at a snail's pace through any and all tasks and activities, and thoroughly enjoys KPop, driving her Black Pearl, reels, taking 45-minute showers, and spending too much money at coffee houses.

Abby Mae, our Freshman, is a live hand grenade of emotion, primed to go off at any second. When not deep in the midst of a rage-fest, she can be found buried in Snapchat, rearranging her bedroom, watching questionable movies, stealing her sister's clothes, baking inedible dishes, and not doing her laundry. Hobbies include attending JV Pom practice twelve times per week, drawing, trashing various rooms throughout the house, losing personal belongings, and wearing hoodies that are three sizes too large.

Watson is an eleven-year-old dachshund mix that can out-sleep any other dog in the continental United States. His laziness is matched only by his grumpiness, his dominance over dogs three times his size, and his little patience for any other dog having a good time in his presence. He enjoys barking at passersby and neighbors' dogs, brawling with his younger brother, and chasing down squirrels.

Samson is probably six years old, but we'll likely never know (he was a stray.) This hobo-turned-Hough is unbridled chaos in dog form, and loves tipping over trash cans, chewing up underwear, and eating anything you put in front of him. An enthusiastic mouth-breather and snorer, he is banned for life from PetSmart, despises baths, and will attack anyone that attempts to trim his toenails.

The Houghs are available for birthdays, weddings, and anniversaries.