Revisiting 1993 (feat. the Clumsy Hough Girls)

Set your phasers for '' 90's '', America:  we're heading back to the Roll Arena.

For those of you not in the know, the Roll Arena is Midland, Michigan's premiere roller skating venue, and has been since, oh. . . who knows.  A looong-ass time, that's for sure.

Yours Truly used to frequent the Arena as a kid growing up in the early '90s.  Our family used to frequent the joint so much during '91 - '94 that, for me, it has become synonymous with early '90s Top 40 Radio.  The Roll Arena DJs would only spin Top 40 back then, and, evidently, nothing has changed.

Fast forwarding to 2015, I once again found myself sitting in the dark, blaring-loud rink, listening to Top 40 pop crappiness accompanied by the shrieks of overly-excited children.  Only now, of course, Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch has been replaced by. . . God knows what.

I don't listen to shallow dance pop music, so I couldn't tell you who sings what.

The girls each received a free skating voucher for their excessive reading achievements earlier this month, so I decided to take them up there while we were all still on Holiday break.  We ended up meeting my mom up there, and the girls finally got to try out their new skates they got for Christmas.

It didn't go well.

Behold:

We always get suckered into renting a couple of these walker thingies whenever the girls go skating.  Our kids are inherently clumsy to begin with, so adding 'shoes with wheels' and 'low lighting' to the mix definitely doesn't help things.

New decade, same vibe (I still can't help but think of Salt N' Pepa or Boys II Men whenever I'm at this place.)

(It took them FOREVER to circumvent this track.)

Mom showed up after awhile, and joined the kids in skating around the rink. . .

(She's about as bad as they are at skating.)

This was taken seconds before Abby fell backwards, pulling Mom down along with her.  I'm really pissed I didn't get a picture of that. 

Abby ignores the DJ's pointed instructions for all skaters to move in one, general direction

Alayna eventually stopped skating on the hardwood track all together, and ditched the plastic walker in order to skate along the carpet instead.  She did this for the next hour and a half.

Good Vibrations.

- Brian