Preach it, Sister

Hi fellas,

You know, I've been meaning to post some of the random crap that comes spewing out of my kids' mouths for some time now.  It happens so much, on a daily basis, that you don't really stop to think about jotting it down.  Rest assured, if I had been doing that from Day One, I'd have a tome to rival War and Peace.

With that in mind, I decided that perhaps, from time to time, I'd collect tidbits of wisdom from my children and group them, by category, for public amusement (and horror. . . also horror).

This time around, I'd like to share with you some of the Cannonball's recent theological musings.  As she gets older, she starting to ask more and more questions about life, death, and what comes next.  Pretty hardcore topics for a chick that just turned five, but hey - at least she's not burning ants in the backyard. . .

Concerning Life After Death:

Alayna: "When you get old, and your skin gets curly, you go to Heaven."
Brian: "That's right."
Alayna: "Does everybody go to Heaven?"
Brian: "Some people do."
Alayna: "Do animals go to Heaven?"
Brian: "Well-"
Alayna: "Dogs go to Heaven.  Like the movie with the girl."
Brian: "Oh yeah, that's -"
Alayna: "You know who's in Heaven?"
Brian: "Who?"
Alayna: "God.  And Jesus."
Brian: "That's right."
Alayna: "And chickens."
Brian: "... what?"
Alayna: "You know, 'cause it rains."


Alayna: "When are you going to Heaven?"
Brian: "Hopefully not for awhile.  When I'm really old."
Alayna: "You're really old now!"

Concerning Jesus Christ:

Brian: "So. . . what'd you learn about in Sunday School today?"
Alayna: "Jesus was doing magic, then he fell on his butt.  Then he bumped his head.  Then the mean boy came and took him.  Then he laid down in his nest.  Then he took him back."

Alayna: "When I turn into a grown up, I'm going to get a Baby Jesus."

Alayna: "Jesus loves us, and he died for us.  When I get old, I'm going to marry him."
Brian: "I can think of a few things wrong with that.  He's in Heav-"
Alayna: "Fine!  When I go to Heaven I'll marry him!"

Concerning God:

Alayna: "You know, God made everything."
Brian: "Oh yeah?"
Alayna: "Yup.  He made animals, and flowers, and boogers.  And Wal-Mart."

Alayna: "God's really strong.  He'g got super big muscles.  Can he beat up the Ninja Turtles?"
Brian: "All four at once?  Yeah, probably."
Alayna: "The Power Rangers?"

Alayna:  "When it rains, God's peeing on people."

- Brian

'Memorial Day,' or 'How the Houghs Sort of Reclaimed Their Yard'

Last time I touched base with you guys, I mentioned how we had set up our pool.

Remember that?

Well, as it turns out, we did discover a small, pin-hole leak in the pool - one that slowly and eventually grew into the size of a quarter.  What prevented the leak from being noticeable before was the fact that it was directly on the bottom of the pool, which meant the water was leaking out very, very slowly.  We knew something was up when, each morning when uncovering the pool, the pool was slightly lower.

Oh yeah, and the ground was soaked.

Not awesome.

'Soaked' doesn't really do the situation justice, though.  Our yard was soggily saturated with water (that better?)- anywhere you stepped, muddy water rose up through the grass to drown your feet.  How much of this was the pool leak and how much was the broken sprinkler line running from the exterior waterline to one of the side yard sprinkler heads remains to be determined (yes, it's been one of those summers so far).

Summer's First Hero.

Long story short, I purchased an underwater, vinyl patch kit off Amazon and, one day after work, jumped in the pool and fixed the sum'bitch.  Meanwhile, Kris ordered a plumber to come out and - thank God - the line leak to our sprinkler system wasn't anything serious.


Now summer was on.

Making cupcakes for Abby's class, commemorating her 'technical' birthday.  (We like doping other people's kids up on sugar whenever possible.)

A beautiful, gay rainbow, following our daily, afternoon, torrential downpour.

Classroom cupcakes.

Remember this Don Bluth gem? All Dogs Go to Heaven has been a daily staple these last few days, which I'd take in a second over the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. . .

Abby opening presents from Grandma and Papa John (this, I believe, is a Periwinkle Dress)

Skypin'

With the pool repaired and the levels in good shape, we've been getting some serious action out of the pool this last week or so. . .

Both girls have gotten a lot better with swimming on their own. . .

This Memorial Day weekend was definitely spent outdoors.  The weather down here was awesome (if not hotter than Hades), and after many hours of yard work - toiling with weeds, overgrown tall grass behind the house, insects, and even pit bulls (seriously) - we spent the majority of the day in the pool.

The greatest thing about letting the kids swim in the pool is that it wears them out like nobody's business. . . which makes putting them down for naps a total breeze.

Enjoying an afternoon pipe, having spent the morning lounging on my newest toy. . .

The S.S. Nap Time.  Perfect for sunbathing while the kids are napping and the sun is at its zenith.

Matching sunglasses.  Not sure if that was planned or not.

In closing, here's a picture of an abandoned, black, baby doll Alayna spotted on Orange Blossom Trail on the way home from Sunchild the other day.  Rest in Peace, kid.

- Brian