Santa, Four Hours of Pain, and a Tribal Feast

Well, this was definitely one hell of a Saturday.

I'd been looking forward to today for a long, long time. Back in May, after Kris and a bunch of the moms from our Tribe decided to get matching Mom Tattoos, Yours Truly started to reconsider getting more ink done.  I had gotten my last tattoos way back in like 2010, and while I had initially intended on getting more back when I was in my early 30's, I kept putting it off, year after year.

By the time I hit my 40's, I had kinda all but forgotten about it. I was too old, too much time had passed, and I figured 'what's the point.'

Then, one day last summer, I was speaking to my nephew, who had recently started getting some work done on his arms. I had expressed my thoughts on being too old nowadays to get back into getting new work done, and he - in all his nineteen-year-old wisdom - commented that I was going to grow old anyway, and that I might as well look like a badass while I slide into my 50's. And Goddamn it, he was right.

So, after doing some research and browsing various artists' portfolios online, I found a local artist named Brenton who worked in BlackBall Tattoo here in town, and he - and his studio - were some of the highest rated in Michigan. I booked a consultation, where I went in - Alayna in tow (because she's already at that age where she's chomping at the bit to get one done herself) - and went over my ideas with him. He's a pretty popular, in-demand artist, so there was a six-month wait list to get in with him, but considering the size and scope of what I wanted done - which I'll disclose later in this post - I was fine with that. I booked an appointment for November and in the meantime began to save up for what would ultimately be a sizable chunk of change.

But, as the saying goes, you get what you pay for (which you'll see for yourself in a sec.)

Aside from my day-long session today, we Houghs had a couple other noteworthy things going on today. First up, was Midland's annual Santa Parade, which herald's Santa Claus' return to Midland (because, you know, he lives here in the weeks leading up to Christmas Eve, which is canon.) Later that evening, we'd be attending our Tribe's annual Friendsgiving, which was once again being hosted by the Griffins. I'd obviously be rolling in a few hours late due to my session, but planned on leaving Black Ball and heading straight to the Griffins once I was done.

So, start to finish, today was absolutely insane. But insane in a good way.

Check it out. . . .

Abby and Midland High's JV Pom Team would be marching directly behind the band. As the parade staging area began to amass at the school, the team was able to get a quick group pic in (some of the pom kids were also in the band, hence the band kids thrown in the mix.)

A local drug addict recovery house kicks the parade off down Ashman Street. Nothing weird about that whatsoever.

Midland High's Marching Band. We were once again set up on the corner between Kris' office and the local Kroger, which was a pretty good vantage point for pics and video, and also allowed us to bypass the unavoidable clusterf*** of traffic once the parade wrapped up. Unfortunately for Yours Truly, I was late meeting up with Kris and the Johnsons (who we were watching the parade with) and ultimately had to park like a frickin' mile and a half down the road and walk to where they were situated. So that was fun.

The Pommers were marching directly behind the band, so our pics of them weren't the greatest (they weren't spread out that well.)

Abby and her squad.

Ella, as enthusiastic as ever.

The Great Lakes Loons roll out their train and mascot for events like this. I want one of those Russian-styled, plaid Loons hats. Gonna have to look into that.

The epic return of this absolute legend. . . .

The Pom Team, on the way back to the high school. Midland High's band marched from their school down to Kroger, then pulled off into the parking lot and Dow High's marching band took over for the last half of the parade. Super convenient for us with them doing it this way, because we didn't have to fight downtown traffic like we did last year when we had to extract Abby from all the chaos at the parade's end.

Abby and Nica (and no, they're not lesbians.)

After over an hour and a half later, at the tail end of the parade (of course), the Northern Railroad finally came by. . . 

Santa Claus and his wife (whatever her name is, it's not important.)

So, like it or not, it is now officially the Holiday Season. Because Thanksgiving sucks.

My appointment was at 1pm, so I had just enough time to come home after the parade, get something to eat, and then drive down there when they opened. Upon checking in, I had to fill out the usual waiver forms - liability crap and other such stuff that's pretty par for the course - and then Brenton went over his designs with me for approval.

So I had gone in with only a handful of requests for my tattoo (which would fill in my shoulder and upper arm down to my bicep), and had given him free rein to design it as he saw fit. I wanted a Masonic tattoo with the following elements from Freemasonry: the traditional Masonic square and compass, the latin phrase 'Virtus Junxit Mors Non Separabit' ('Whom Virtue Unites, Death Cannot Separate'), some acacia leaves for filler (it's from the Master Mason degree), and a skull. I stressed that I didn't want the skull to have it's lower jaw, and that I didn't want it to look 'bad ass,' but rather as if it had just been taken out of a crypt. Brenton took all these suggestions and whipped up a design that came out exactly as I had been envisioning - it was perfect.

We started around 2pm, once the design was locked in and transferred to a stencil and placed on my arm (the purple ink you see here, which serves as a road map for him while he works.) About ninety minutes into the session we stopped for about a half an hour so Brenton could get some food, and I took this to send to Kris to update her on my progress.

A couple hours later, around 5:30pm, Kris texted me this pic of folks starting to settle in at the Griffin house for Friendsgiving. Always a ton of awesome food on hand with this group, I was more than ready to eat at this point.

We didn't take any more breaks during the session - I opted to power through it, despite the pain being nearly unbearable at points. Most of the work was a dull pain, but after four hours in a chair even that was wreaking havoc on my stress/adrenaline levels. Whenever he had to work around the back of the arm - the triceps, and especially near the armpit - it became super intense. Brenton was able to get a lot more done with this initial session than we had anticipated, but a second session will have to be scheduled in six to eight weeks once my arm heals. He's going to fill in all the negative space with shading and texture, add detail and shading to the existing work, then add white ink (which is super painful) to the design in areas to boost contrast and add highlights. He's moving studios in two weeks, as he's a master artist and is opening up his own place - he's giving me a Black Friday discount and the next session will be much cheaper (though this first session ended up being less expensive than I had budgeted for anyway, so I was pretty happy with that.) All in all, a great experience and I'm hoping to get more work done by him in the coming years.

Around 7pm, after I had paid and left BlackBall, I swung by a local church to pick up Abby from her 'Stringsgiving' (all the cellos from orchestra had a Thanksgiving of their own that ended at 7pm, so it was perfect timing.) From there we headed over to the Griffin's to meet up with the rest of the Tribe. The wives had all pranked the husbands by buying us all matching, tacky Thanksgiving shirts and coercing us into wearing them out for the evening. When we all showed up in matching shirts, the wives were beside themselves.

Kris demanded I walk around and show off my new ink (you can see the strips of Saniderm or whatever it's called on my arm - that was a lot of fun to strip off the next day, I'll tell you what.)

The Kings of the Hill, all in douchey, matching shirts. Left to Right: Lonnie Big Balls, Steve, The Pro, Baby Driver, Rob, Collier, Damn It Tom, Big E, and the Colonel.

Folks continued to graze for most of the evening. When I first got there I tried eating a little bit, but even though I was hungry I was super shaky from my session and couldn't manage to eat much.

Morgan and Lonnie put on some college football in the living room and the dads kinda lounged around in there for most of the evening.

The Moms once again staked claim to this dining room table and clucked like a bunch of loud-ass hens for most of the night.

Morgan and I were tasked with taking pics of the girls, so we had to mess with them a bit. . .

Amy got a ton of pics like this on her phone as they posed for their picture.

Kelli, Kris, Stephanie, Danielle, Mees, Susan, Amy, Courtney, Lacy, and Alicia.

The Inner Five dads.

Dudes watching football.

Some of the kids downstairs in the basement (there were three times this number on hand, though - no idea where the rest are.)

Abby and Ella fell asleep on one of the couches in the living room - the parade must've worn their asses out.)

The wives played games for most of the night. That and booze led to a ridiculous increase in volume as the night progressed. As usual.

Energy definitely not as high in the living room.

I have no idea what's happening here. Another epic Saturday in the books, kids.

- Brian

 

Santa, Poms, and Friendsgiving

Season's Greetings, Internet.

I didn't take this pic, but someone else did and posted it on Facebook.

We haven't hit Thanksgiving yet, but none of that bullshit matters anymore. For today, dear readers, marked the return of Santa Claus to Midland, Michigan, via the annual Santa Parade. This momentous occasion, which sees Santa ride a train (on wheels) down Eastlawn, Saginaw, and Ashman streets on his way to his yuletide home at the famous Santa House, marks the official beginning of the Holiday Season.

You heard me, Thanksgiving fans.

Like she's done the last few years, Abby once again marched in the parade with the rest of the Northeast Pom Team. Unfortunately for us, they were positioned almost at the very end of the parade this year, which meant we had to sit (er, stand) through the entire parade in order to get some pics and video of her and team as they marched by. 

Not that it mattered, Kris and Courtney (who we met up with) insisted on staying until Santa came by, and he's dead-last every year.

After the parade, we went over to the Griffin residence for our annual 'Friendsgiving' celebration. This is like Thanksgiving itself, just a week earlier and with our local 'tribe' of friends (the ten or so families that make up our Midland friend group.) We kicked off dinner around 5pm, then hung out and had drinks, played some games, etc. before retiring for the evening. You know, more or less the usual - any excuse to get together and gorge ourselves stupid.

So here you go, folks - another Saturday of weirdness with the Houghs. Enjoy. . 

Frosty was losing air and falling off the float. Dude needs to stop hitting the egg nog so damn hard.

Midland might not have as many horses on hand as Clare does for its parades, but they managed to scrounge up a few.

A super gay unicorn.

We met up with Courtney down at Kris' office, which is located near the corner of Ashman right across a side street from Kroger. This is super convenient because we can park in the the private lot, have access to bathrooms and hot chocolate (inside the office), and our corner parade-watching vantage is all of, like, thirty feet away. Courtney had the Larson kids and Jackson's friend, Aiden, along with her, and Kris was able to get a selfie of the whole group while we waited (forever) for Abby, Ella and the rest of the pom team to pass by.

Some local company tricked out a vintage hearse like the old Ghostbusters car. Pretty rad.

Featuring Slimer in the back seat, a nice touch.

This sign was posted on the back of someone's RV float (if you know, you know.)

After over an hour of watching other folks pass by, the Northeast Pom team finally came into view. Courtney ran into the middle of the intersection to start taking pics.

Not sure what the deal was with that lady trying to smother her dog. Lots of crazies come out of the woodwork at events like this.

Ella, at far left, and Abby, at far right, in the front row of the team (which makes sense, since they're the  veterans and two of the best performers on the team.)

Look. More horses.

I'd love to normalize converting vehicles into pirate ships. Let's get on this, America.

One of Midland's high-tech, futuristic fire trucks. This is Courtney's favorite part of the parade. Shit looks like a Transformer.

At long last, Santa and his train finally arrive, bringing up the rear.

Santa (the real one) and his ball and chain.

After the parade passed by our location, we headed back to the van and drove downtown to rendezvous with Abby and team at the end of their trek. Unfortunately, they were still making their way down Ashman, so we parked down by the East Building and made our way down Main Street in order to meet up with her. As we passed by Ace Hardware, we saw this awesome Holiday display in one of their storefront windows.

We ran back into Courtney and the Larson kids shortly before the pom team passed us a second time.

Kris was able to nab a few selfies with Abby as we followed the team back down Main Street towards the end of the parade route.

Another selfie, featuring some random, dashing gentleman.

After the parade, we headed home and basically just sat around for a few hours. When it started approaching dinner time, Kris threw together a couple dishes to contribute to our annual Friendsgiving, I threw together my trusty cooler, and we headed over to the Griffin residence. We showed up around the same time as the Larsons and Bardens, but had to kinda wait around for, like, a half an hour until all the late arrivals showed up. . . with their contributions.

The husbands took the initiative this year and snagged the big, dining room table (in previous years, we've always gotten screwed and have had to cram in at that small-ass, kitchen nook table you see the wives at. They complained a little at first, buuuuut. . . . f*** it.

Lots of awesome food on hand this year. Several different side dishes - casseroles, mac and cheese, potatoes, stuffings, dips, veggies, breads, etc. - along with hams, smoked briskets, sliders, charcuterie boards, pies, cookies, and other desserts. 

I've said it before and I'll say it again: this group will EAT.

You can't tell from this picture, but these hens were clucking something fierce - they're so loud when they get together we have a hard time hearing ourselves talk from the other side of the room.

The kids were in the basement for the entire night, only resurfacing to grab more food and then scamper off back downstairs.

Picked up six-pack of my all-time, favorite Christmas beer, which was fortunately still in stock at Cork and Ale earlier today (I made Kris stop off there on our way back from the parade downtown.) I had a few of these left over in the basement beer fridge, so a couple weeks ago when I was picking up seasonal beer I passed on picking it up then. It had been gnawing at the back of my brain ever since, so I was glad to have finally set my mind at ease. I won't be doing that again next year, I can guarantee you that.

Lonnie opened up this $60 bottle of 'whiskey wine' (yes, you heard that right) to share with us dads. It's a red wine from Leelanau that's aged in whiskey barrels, and you can actually taste the whiskey pretty well (though its well-balanced, not over-powering.) At 20% we only drank like 3 or 4 oz apiece, but damn was it ever good.

We started a few simultaneous games of euchre after awhile. Lonnie, Tom, Steven and Collier played through two games pretty quick, but Mitch, Morgan, Erik and I had a long, drawn-out slugfest that was quite possibly the ugliest game of euchre any one of us had ever played. Every one of us euchred, every one of us was caught in a 'screw the dealer' scenario at least twice apiece, and, in the end, Morgan and I won by one point. But in a game that ugly, there really aren't any winners, folks.

Found this beer in my fridge earlier in the evening while packing up my cooler - it's one of the last from a sampler pack I picked up in the UP on Brocation 2020. Back then you couldn't get Upper Hand anywhere in the Lower Peninsula, so you had to stock up before you came back down south. Now that's not the case, and you can start finding it around here and there.

Tom's wife, Susan, brought me a box of dusty, old vinyl to look through - her dad had passed away a couple years ago, then her mother-in-law, and this was a bunch of their records. Mostly the kind of crap you'd find in a dollar bin at Radio Wasteland, or sitting around on the bottom shelf of a local Goodwill store, but I was happy to look up some of it while the other guys continued playing cards. The wives got a huge kick out of this because I had to use my reading glasses in order to read some of the worn run-out grooves.

Things wound down pretty early this evening - the Larsons took off to catch a movie at the local cinema around 9:30pm, and us, the Sheahans, and the Colliers weren't far behind.

While most of these albums were in pretty rough shape - they had been stored in an attic, so were exposed to moisture (damaging the outer sleeves), dust, and scratches (no inner sleeves in any of them), there were a few things that peaked my interest. There was a case of 78s that were in new condition, and a couple LPs looked like I might be able to get $15 or so out of them if I ran 'em through my Spin Clean machine first.

That Stones album was in rough shape, but it's a first pressing, so even in crappy condition I might be able to get something out of it.

Collier - like all the wives - thought I looked ridiculous and decided to get a couple pics. I look like some sorta frickin' Grand Rapids hipster. . . should've chosen a better outfit I guess.

Food comas knocked a lot of folks on their asses this evening.

These guys were playing cards as Kris and I packed up and left, sometime around 10:30pm. A pretty chill evening, capping off the first 'official' day of the Holiday Season. . .

- Brian