Obligatory Pumpkin Post

The Cannonball

Well, we all knew this was coming.  Can't not have an obligatory pumpkin-carving post, am I right?

In typical Hough fashion, we put this off until the absolute last moment, because this is one of those family activities that is half-fun, half- giant, pain in the ass.  The gutting of the pumpkins?  Not fun.  The clean up?  Also not fun.  Carving your own pumpkin?  Kinda fun.  It's honestly a shitload of work for a mere few pictures every year, but I suppose it's one of those things that we, as parents, have to do in order to not be total deadbeats.

Kinda like Easter.  God, I f***ing hate Easter.

Anyway, I'm not gonna caption these like crazy - they're pretty self-explanatory, it's kids carving pumpkins - but here you go, folks.  Your annual dose of Hough pumpkin-carving.

Enjoy. . . 

(She comes by it naturally.)

Old man Watson.

Abby spent like a half an hour cutting the top off her pumpkin.  No joke.

She hates this part of the process more than any other kid I've ever seen.  I feel like we get this picture every year.

Yes, she went and put on medical gloves for this.

I kinda made mine up as I went this year.  The results were meh.

Samson lurked under the table, next to the trash can, for over an hour.  He's the hobo-est dog I've ever met.

Abby's singing along to Nirvana.  I was honestly impressed she knew the lyrics so well.

Kris spent the better part of this process on her phone, either texting back and forth with the other moms in our friend group or else researching her pumpkin design (unlike me, who just starts hacking away at it.) 

I contemplated putting some weird nostrils on it, but then said 'screw it.'

Alayna's ridiculous short attention span drew her to the living room after she gutted out her pumpkin, where she started playing tug of war with Samson (who absolutely loves the game, unlike his older brother.)

Alayna wanted me to draw the design of her pumpkin for her, which she dictated to me in detail.  Why she can't do this herself, as a 7th grader, I don't know. . .

Samson will do this for hours if you let him.  It gets old real fast.

Abby asked to take some selfies with Kris' phone.  She clearly gets it from her mom.

Every damn year we sort the seeds out from the pumpkin guts, with the intention of baking and salting them as a seasonal snack.  And every damn year, after going through this tedious process, we say 'f*** it' and just throw it all in the trash.  Every.  Damn.  Year.

Still patiently awaiting table scraps.

This year's finished products.  Left to Right:  Kris', mine, Abby's, and Alayna's.

See ya in 2021 for some more obligatory pumpkin carving (provided society survives 2020 without total collapse. . .) 

- Brian

Carving Pumpkins

Happy Nearly-Halloween, America!

So, as you know, this weekend for us was, well, insane.  School parties, neighborhood house parties, lesson plan parties (oh, wait.)  Anyway, by Sunday evening we were all pretty exhausted and tired and not looking forward to another week of work and school.  We had already started winding the kids down for the evening, getting them - and us - into pajamas, when we suddenly realized, much to our dismay, that we had forgotten to carve the f***ing Halloween pumpkins.

Like a bunch of champs.

Trick or Treating would be tomorrow after work/school, so we were forced to do it tonight, regardless of how much - ooooh, how much - we did NOT want to do it.

This may be the fastest blitzkrieg of a pumpkin-carving session the Houghs have ever had.

Behold:

The gutting process begins

The girls are getting pretty good at handling knives - we didn't have to help them out at all this year.

Kris made a pumpkin with braces this year - she's in orthdonics, folks - so, of course, both kids wanted braces on their pumpkins as well.

Abby and her finished product

From left to right:  the party pumpkin (the one that had dip coming out of its mouth), Alayna's pumpkin, mine, Abby's, and Kris'.

The Hough Family's 2016 Halloween Pumpkins

- Brian

Seasonal Mess

Cowabunga.

Hi again.

So custom dictates that we, as Americans, have to go out and buy some gourds this month.  Giant frickin' vegetables that only get their moment in the spotlight once a year, then become the culinary world's red-headed stepchildren throughout the following seasons.  We carve weird faces in them, set them on our porch, and then promptly throw them away.  This is a mandatory thing to do when you have kids.

And no one knows why.

I think it's absolutely ridiculous that people in this country follow traditions without knowing anything about them and where they come from.  But hey. . . that's just me being a history teacher.  I'll spare you the history lesson, America, but know that I'm disappointed in you.  Again.

Anyway, long story short, here's how our family once again blindly followed 'Murican tradition.

Smurf it:

Grandma picked us up some pumpkins from Jack's here in Midland, and the girls also had pumpkins they picked up with Nana from a pumpkin patch outing a couple weeks ago.

The Lions lost again today.  They're absolute garbage this year, but that's part of being a Lions fan, I guess - wearing your Charlie Batch jersey and watching your team lose horrifically to a sub-par opponent.

Abby realizes that her pumpkin scooper, well, sucks.

Pumpkin surgery.

The Cannonball breaks into an impromptu dance routine.  For no reason whatsoever.

Snacks.

Abby hated this.  Carving pumpkins might be a fun thing for most kids, but not this one.

Alayna likes anything even remotely 'craft'-oriented.

I never have a plan beforehand.  I could probably be way more into this, but I just never feel like going all out for pumpkins.  I'm a pretty lazy person.

Abby decided to carve Michael Jackson's nose this year.  

Kris gets artsy.

The Hough Family's 2015 Pumpkins.

- Brian