The Last of 2015

The girls' first-ever snowman. 

December always feels like a speeding school bus on fire going over a cliff.  Seriously.  The period of time from African American Friday to New Year's Eve lasts about as long as it takes me to take a crap.

(Considering I have a magazine, obviously.)

This stands in stark contrast with the Ohio months of the year - such as August and April - in which nothing of great consequence happens, and consequently they last FOREVER.  You can ascertain as much by going back into our Family Archives and seeing how many blog posts emanate from they respective months.  December gets, like, a dozen or so posts.  There might be two from August.

I've included some randoms from this once-tenth month of the year (study up on your Roman history, America), as usual.  Seeing how we had so much going on this month, you're left with kind of a bizarre sampling, but enjoy it nonetheless. . .

Kris trimming Watson's nails.  We bit the bullet and finally splurged on a top-rated set of nail clippers off of Amazon, as we had grown sick and tired of dropping $10 every few weeks to drive the dog across town to a groomer's.  It's a nerve-racking process, and Watson definitely loathes it, but Kris has only spilled blood on one occasion. 

Chris and Nicole's Christmas card this year.  They have a thing for cats.  And sweaters.

Going a few rounds with Abby, who has made an attempt lately at learning this. . .

(Shows some promise, but I think it's going to take awhile.)

My old roommates used to wear Viking hats and chug Bud Light out of 32 oz steins on a Tuesday evening.  This is what my new roommates do (somehow not as cool.)

It's the thought that counts, kids.

Abby demanded this note be taped up on the outside of the fireplace, where Santa could readily spot it Christmas Eve.  We're all a bit weirded out with this.

The Cannonball reads one of her new favorite books, Aesop's Fables, to a classroom of stuffed animals before going to bed.  What seven-year-old doesn't obsess over a 2800 year-old collection of anecdotes penned by a Greek slave?

Kris and her mom, Marcy, shortly before heading out to check out the girls' Christmas Nativity pageant at the First United Methodist Church in downtown Midland.

Dad's 62nd birthday fell on a Saturday this year, so Chris (and his dog, Tucker) hitched a ride up to Clare with us, meeting Jeff and his brood there.  Here's the two of them holding down the kid's table.

Tucker's pretty chill, but Watson and Bailey had to be removed from the communal space during dinner, as they're too wound-up and loud to be around people eating.

Alayna and Bradley enjoy some candy canes (and back talk) following an awesome Buccelli's dinner.

Craft beer and school spirit.

Hanging out with Nana

Three dogs, even in a big house, is just too damn much. . .

These kids love themselves some pinball. . . even though they're terrible at it.

FINALLY.  We went and saw Star Wars VII: The Force Awakens on December 20th: three days after opening night.  In order to play it safe during this time period, I disconnected myself from social media, the Internet, and my smartphone as a precaution, fearing the inevitability that some asshole out there in Cyberspace dropping unwanted spoilers when I was least expecting it.  Besides Yours Truly, Abby was probably the most excited member of our family to see it (we're Star Wars buddies), so she wrote this note on our front door for the whole neighborhood to see.  We ended up arriving at the theater an hour early, which Kris thought was overkill, but proved to be a very smart move:  there were eight people ahead of us, and shortly after we got there the line grew until it snaked out of the theater and around the side.  As a result of us showing up early, we ended up getting some of the best seats in the house for the movie, which, truth be told, was AWESOME.  But that's a whole other blog post itself, honestly, so I'll save that for another time. . .

Look what I found on Netflix the other day - Pee Wee's Playhouse Christmas Special.  I grew up with this on VHS, but Kris didn't think it'd be appropriate for the girls. . .

. . . who knows why.  What's not to like about a talking chair, Little Richard, Charo, the King of Cartoons, and the one and only Pee Wee Herman?  I mean, it's not like the guy that played Pee Wee ever did anything that society would deem 'inappropriate,' right?  Right, America?

Deer in headlights.

As you all know, Old Man Winter properly screwed us this year:  no White Christmas to speak of, but shortly after Christmas, we get this crap. . .

Sure, it's pretty. . . but shoveling this crap (especially when it's all wet and heavy like this snowfall was) is a pain in the ass (and back.) 

Here's hoping this snow business only sticks around for a month or so.  That's about the norm up here in Michigan, right?  Guys?

- Brian

Across Three Christmases

Merry Christmas, nation!

I don't know about you folks, but I'm really, really tired.  We survived yet another go-'round with the Christmas Beast, and, as always, it was an exhausting affair.

Like I've mentioned before, nobody in this house gets much sleep the night before Christmas.  Kris and I wait until after the girls go to sleep - and are asleep for awhile (we do check, yes) - before placing last-minute bows on gifts and setting them out around the tree.  We then set out stuffed stockings, crumble up the cookies left for Santa, dump his milk down the sink, and basically 'prime the house' for Christmas morning.

After all that crap is over and done with, we have some Holiday cocktails and watch one of our all-time favorite Christmas movies, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.

Christmas Morning.  The house primed and cameras ready to roll when kids wake up.

Generally we're in bed by 11pm or so, but Yours Truly tends to stress out over the 'big reveal' of Christmas morning:  making sure all the lights, candles, and TV fireplace footage is lit and the cameras rolling for when the girls get around to waking up.  This worrying tends to cut in on my sleep, and last year was so bad I had to take a nap halfway through Christmas.

This year I decided to cut myself a break by locking the girls' bedroom door in the middle of the night, thereby preventing them from rushing out into the living room at 4:30am and finding an unlit tree and no camera to catch their reaction(s).  Kris wasn't sold on the idea (fire hazard and all), so I got up around 3:30am and did it.

Yes, these are the things I lose sleep over.  Don't judge me.

Anyway, this year went off without a hitch - everything was in place, the girls were heavily recorded throughout the day, and we all got some pretty sweet shit for Christmas.  Couldn't ask for a better day, honestly.  Later on in the morning, after the dust and wrapping paper settled around our house, Chris and his new wife Nicole swung by for gift-exchanging and mimosa-drinking, and for some of Kris' Holiday breakfast.  After over-indulging on everything, we sluggishly loaded our offspring into a van and drove over to Mom's house, where we celebrated a third Christmas with our greater Congleton/Hough family.

And so, in closing, I leave you with a yuletide offering of a pictures.

Enjoy. . .

Alayna woke up first this year (as always), and bum-rushed her stocking.  We had to remind her to check out the cookies and milk left out for 'Santa,' and to hold off on her stocking until her sister was up and around.

Abby had a very Star Wars-ish Christmas this year: nearly 9 out of 10 things she got was somehow Star Wars-related.  Not that she was complaining.

Abby really got into the spirit of giving this year:  she made every person in the family at least one present (usually a drawing on notebook paper covered in wrapping paper), and crafted a few items (such as the glazed ceramic snowman shown here) in art at her school.

As mentioned before, Alayna was really wanting Shopkins this year (that's what she asked Santa for), so we made sure to stuff her stocking with a crapload of those stupid things.

Stockings having been looted, kids moved on to some of the presents from Santa. . .

Whatever they ask of Santa is wrapped up and labeled as "From: Santa" (so Alayna proceeded to open a bunch of Shopkins toys, and Abby opened more Star Wars crap.)

(Abby really wanted Darth Vader pajamas and slippers this year)

The Millenium Falcon

I'm willing to bet she loses half of these stupid things within the week. . .

One thing Kris and I started years ago was to give each of the girls $5 to spend on the other parent.  This kinda reinforces with them the 'giving' aspect of the Holidays.  The Cannonball, apparently appreciating my love of booze and pirates, got me this skull-molded shot glass.  I'm not complaining.

These Star Wars comics are pretty well written and illustrated, and Abby's really taken a liking to them recently.  Only downside is that she won't let Kris read them to her, as Kris can't do the multiple voices like I can.  Switching back and forth between Darth Vader, Jabba, Admiral Ackbar, and Chewbacca utterly destroys your vocal chords.  Take my word on it.

An hour or two into gift-opening, showing no sign of slowing down any time soon. . .

They spent $2 on each other this year, too (Abby bought Alayna the box in her hair, shown here.)

Abby modeling the flower beret Alayna got her for Christmas.

We actually bought this for the girls last year - wrapped it and everything - but it fell behind a box in my closet and was consequently forgotten about until I was packing up my old Study for our move to Michigan.  I kept it wrapped for this Christmas, but had completely forgotten what was inside it; needless to say, Kris and I were both looking forward to the girls opening it so we could figure out what it was.  As it turns out, it was a twin-pack of Nerf Rebelle blasters. . . which Abby didn't really approve of.

Rollerskates (they've gone to the Roll Arena here in town a few times and really enjoy it. . . despite the fact that they suck.)

Guess how frequently they fell on their asses doing this?

. . . aaaaand another pirate-themed gift from a child.

My kids know me well.

The Rise Against the Empire Star Wars set for Disney Infinity.  As I mentioned before, I bought Infinity 3.0 back in October, along with a Han Solo figure, so that I could unlock all the content for them ahead of time.  Abby really wanted this set, as it came with the play set piece - the clear-ish Death Star, shown between the two figures, that allows you to play through the original trilogy movies - and her favorite Star Wars character, Princess Leia.

Fester's Quest for the original Nintendo.  Yes, that game exists; I had never heard of it, but apparently Kris grew up with it. 

Waterproof Blu-tooth speaker?  Showers have just gotten a whole hell of a lot sweeter, folks.

This game terrifies everyone in the family.

I don't own a fire poker, so I have to make do with an Iberian falcata.

Kris' office on Christmas morning. . .

We had two fireplaces going this morning.  Gotta stay warm, folks.

A whisky-filled candy cane.  Thanks, "Santa."

Nicole and Chris brought over a bucket of adoptable stuffed animals from the World Wildlife Foundation (or Fund? - I forget) for the girls.  They gave them a set of three stuffed animals - a dolphin, an ocelot, and some kind of a fox.  Basically how this works is that you donate to their fund, and in return you 'adopt' three different species that are endangered, threatened, or near extinct.  As part of your 'adoption kit,' they send you a wooden bucket with three stuffed animals, their fact cards, and certificates of ownership.

The girls really liked this, and not only 'cause of the trio of stuffed animals, either: they were happy to be 'saving' three different species from extinction.  Or however that works.

. . . and Chris surprised me and Kris with these add-ons for that Nightmare VHS boardgame we played back in early October.  Three, new games that work with the existing boardgame and pieces.  Three new 'nightmares' to adventure through (over cocktails, of course.) 

After a cholesterol-raising brunch - and more than a few mimosas and egg nogs - Chris, Nicole, and our family caravanned over to Mom and John's house for our family Christmas with them.  Since the earliest days of our parents' divorce, Chris, Jeff and I have always attempted to celebrate Christmases at each parent's house at the same time, so it was cool to actually make it work this year (this being the first time since 2011.) 

As a family, we decided to stay in our pajamas this year.  Screw it.

Grandma and Grandpa Chinery came out to, shortly after lunch.

One of Abby's presents was a remote-controlled Strawberry Shortcake car, which she didn't put down the rest of the day.

One of the gifts we gave Mom and John this year was an iPhoto calendar, which I put together over the last few months.

Chris and I also threw in on a camera, to replace the archaic thing Mom had been shooting with for the last few years.

Queen of Photobombs

Showing Grandma and Grandpa Chinery the calendar

'Tis the Season, folks.

 

Playing with Shopkins.  SOOOO much fun. . .

This can't be that fun, operating a remote controlled car on such a small surface.  To each their own, I guess. 

Nicole looks thrilled.

The girls got a lot of arts and crafts stuff, which was cool because it's one of those things that they never ask for, but ALWAYS play with.

Carnage

Jeff and Annie showed up an hour or two after everyone else. . .

I can't believe Mom still has this stuff. . . this was in our house growing up back in the '80s. 

Uncle Chris poops his pants.  Either that, or else Scarlett just landed on something she shouldn't have.

Alayna attempts introducing Scarlett to the horrific world of Shopkins. . .

We ended up going home around 6pm, and everyone (Kris, the girls, the dog) was asleep by 8pm.  Yours Truly stayed up until about 9pm, watching TV, until I could no longer stand it.  And THAT, dear readers, is how the Hough Family celebrated Christmas Day 2015.  But more is yet to come - stay tuned. . .

- Brian