The Houghs: Monkey Joe's

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Christmas Pre-Season: the Month Formerly Known as November

Sunset over the Cannonball's school.

Happy Pre-Christmas, America!

I'll just skip over the whole segment where I make clever witticisms like 'isn't is weird how people start putting up Christmas crap, and it isn't even Thanksgiving yet?!' That's become way too similar to 'and what's the deal with airline food?' to me - I mentally shut down when people start talking about it. Kids are spoiled these days, politicians are corrupt, airline food is disgusting, and Christmas is being celebrated way too early these days.

Shut up, folks.

That being said, we Houghs regard Thanksgiving a gauntlet best undertaken quickly and quietly. . . like ninjas peeing in the dark. No sense getting worked up over it, or making grand, elaborate plans for it - for anyone ending their name in 'Hough,' Thanksgiving usually spells out 'peril,' so we don't want to tempt the fates by acknowledging it.

Randomly, Fox 35 down here decided to broadcast a Detroit Lions game, which never happens (they beat the Chicago Bears, which was awesome.) We usually only get to see them lose on Thanksgiving, which we're looking forward to this year (well, I'm looking forward to.)

Abby does this a lot. By herself, in her room. It's weird.

With this in mind, once Halloween is over and done with, we give it a couple weeks before engaging in full-on Yule Mode. For the most part, our shopping is done by African American Friday so we don't have to deal with stupid people shopping for 'deals.' Thanksgiving being on the 28th this year - the latest it's been in twelve years, thereabouts - we opted to throw up the decorations a week prior, opposed to the day after like usual. This gave Yours Truly a week off to enjoy decorations before heading back to work for three weeks of wrangling before Christmas break kicks off.

Check it out:

The girls try Rotisserie Chicken for the first time. . .

Big fans.

Taking the kids to the park with the Voigts.

Placing orders at the shop (fortunately we didn't find any used condoms this time.)

If I were rich, I'd build one of these things in my backyard.

Jackson files a complaint with Customer Service.

"Whatcha havin', Skip?"

Picking up Alayna from school (Note the purple extension in her hair - we basically let her wear whatever she wants to school these days. We're those parents.)

The Cannonball does her own make-up. I'm assuming she was going for a Cyndi Lauper thing, but who knows.

We moved around the living room furniture in order to get things ready for the Christmas Tree, and the new arrangement - with the recliner in the back corner - creates a nice, cozy reading spot that we'll probably keep after the Holidays are over and done with.

Checking out some comics a coworker of mine was getting rid of. . .

Behold: the first Egg Nog of the 2013 Holiday Season.

She chose her own make-up and outfit for her friend Holly (and boyfriend Brady)'s co-birthday party.

Abby, climbing into a bounce house at Monkey Joe's (where, if you'll be so good to remember, they do NOT serve booze.)

"Raise the roof, mother f***ers!"

Abby still hates Joe with a passion.

Holly and Brady (they're twins) gave Alayna one of the VIP seats for the cake segment of the birthday party. . .

Awaiting cake. . . Abby wouldn't sit at the table without adult protection, lest the monkey pounce on her.

Alayna watches her boyfriend play air hockey. . .

After the kids went to bed, we decided to bypass our tradition of waiting until after Thanksgiving and threw up the Christmas Tree. And, as we all know, you can't put up a tree without busting out some festive Christmas cocktails!

As always, we watched our official Christmas Tree decorating movie: Some Like It Hot.

The Tree, decorated (with the exception of the non-breakable ornaments we leave for the girls to hang along the bottom 1/3 of the tree. . .)

After years of saying we were going to do it and having laziness prevail, we finally purchased a star to replace the angel atop our tree. Huzzah.

The snowmen call upon the Dark Forces, offering sacrifices upon fiery alters. . .

The girls' playroom, ready for the holiday season (though the playhouse is probably a fire hazard. . .)

Kris' room, decorated for the season.

In the morning, we let the girls wake up to the newly-decorated tree and let them hang up the remaining ornaments.

Jingle bells have a tendency of being taken off the tree and played with.

Stay tuned for more random Christmas nonsense, folks.

- Brian

Saturday, June 8, 2013

Monkey Woes

Today we celebrated the Cannonball's Fifth Birthday (a week early, for scheduling reasons).

(On a side note, I think it's pretty impressive that I've managed to keep a human being alive for five years.)

Anyway, this year, because it's her fifth and she'll be going into Kindergarten in August, we decided to throw her a grand ol' bash to celebrate. Kris and the mother of one of Alayna's classmates (Derrick) discussed having a co-party for the kids, seeing how their birthdays are a week apart, which would be beneficial for all parties involved seeing how a.) the cost of the party itself would be halved, and b.) more kids would come.

So that's what we did. They (the moms that planned this - I don't plan on anything) decided on a bounce-house/Chuck E. Cheese-ish joint called Monkey Joe's. Not sure if you have that where you're at, but if so. . . don't bother. I wasn't too impressed with the place, mainly because I'm a grown-ass man who doesn't get down with bounce houses and shitty pizza. They didn't really take adults into consideration when they designed the place, and c'mon. . . the adults are the ones that bring their kids to these places.

It's not like the kids are loading themselves up into mini-vans and caravanning out to the local bounce house.

I mean, they didn't even serve adult beverages. Jesus, Chuck E. Cheese at least gave you watered down Bud Light and cheap chardonnay in a plastic cup. It ain't hard, and God knows the crap Chuck was selling wasn't expensive. Monkey Joe's not only failed to provide beer or wine, but they didn't even have coffee.

Who the hell doesn't serve coffee in a restaurant? That's, like, No. 2 behind water, isn't it?

Anyway, the party was a huge success - the kids had a blast and, in the end, I guess that's slightly more important than Yours Truly having a blast. . . which probably wasn't going to happen at a bounce house anyway.

Check it out:

Monkey Joe's is located inside Pointe Place Orlando, down by the Orlando Convention Center and all the upscale hotels. Not sure why it was deemed fancy enough to be down there, but hey. . .

A lot like Chuck E. Cheese's, only cleaner and way more spacious. . .

Their bounce houses are pretty cool. . . if you're into that sort of thing. (I'm not.)

We were assigned the Blue Room.

Big fan of bounce houses.

Derrick and Alayna discuss their primary concern for the party: the probability of mixing up and taking home one another's presents by mistake.

Cakes and party favors. . .

A rare Voigt sighting. We used to see these guys on an almost weekly basis, but having kids and being responsible adults spells doom for grown up fun time. . .