Brocation 2024, Pt. I

Welcome, Internet. To the Greatest Adventure of the Summer.

Tools of the Trade. All the gear necessary for a weekend of dad'ing it up. 

Brocation 2024.

As in previous years, the Kings of the Hill landed on a weekend in early August for a 'Dad Weekend' - leaving behind wives, kids, and jobs (for those secular weirdos who actually work during the summer months) for a few days of awesomeness. Aside from the first Brocation (2020), we've always held this trip on the second weekend of August due to Collier's wedding photography schedule. This year, with his wedding calendar pretty freed up, we decided to move it up one weekend so Lonnie could go (he's usually occupied with Gus Macker.)

Morgan was able to get us a Ford Expedition from his dealership for this year.

This weekend, coincidentally, fell on Kris' birthday, but being the ol' sport she is, she was pretty cool with it.

These trips tend to vary in intensity from year to year. Some years the trips are more adventurous, with more bar-hopping, exploring, and hiking, such as Marquette (2020) and Mackinaw Island (2022.) Others are more chill, with more time being spent at a rental property or hotel, such as Gaylord (2021) or The Bourbon Trail (2023.) This time around was going to be more laid back in nature, and very similar in 'vibe' to Brocation '21, where there was golf that ate up one day, and otherwise we just kinda hung out at the rental property, adventuring around to a few different watering holes for one of the days.

As usual, I was the third member to be picked up, around 8 in the morning.

The setting for this year's Brocation was Ludington and the surrounding area on Michigan's west coast. We had planned on doing eighteen holes of golf in Manistee, charter fishing in Lake Michigan, dune riding in the Silverlake Dunes, spending time at the beach, and bar-hopping along the coast from Pentwater to Ludington.  While this sounds like a lot, it was spread out over four days and three nights, so ultimately the weekend felt slower. 

I was okay with it, though - golf isn't my thing by any means, but I told the guys I'd be fine with it just so long as I got to drive my own golf kart.

Golf karts and beer go together like peanut butter and jelly, gang.

So here you go, America - the first installment of Brocation 2024.

Behold. . . .

The truck was going to be more crammed than usual, on account of all the golf clubs that we had to make space for (and not having a trailer with us this time around.)

After Morgan picked up Erik and I (and we had mixed up some Bloody Marys at my house, per the usual), we hit up the Griffin residence next for Lonnie Big Balls.

Fortunately we had so much extra space in the truck for Lonnie's EIGHT F***ING BAGS. . .

After Lonnie, next up was Damn It Tom. . .

This huge-ass bug was on the trunk hatch as we were loading up Tom's crap (about an inch long.)

Next up was Mitch, the last one that would be riding in the Expedition for the initial drive to Ludington: Omkar (who moved to Indiana last month) was meeting us at the golf course, and Ryan (who had to work today) would be meeting us around dinner time at the Airbnb we had rented.

Shit got pretty dicey there for a bit, but we were able to get it after our decades-old Tetris skills kicked in. Required us to put one of the seats down in the third row in order to stack the golf bags so they'd fit, and we had to shove most of the duffel bags and Tom in the third road as well. Mitch, Yours Truly, and Lonnie then went in the second row (along with my day cooler and tactical backpack.) 

Hitting the highway, after an hour so of picking up men and loading up gear.

Tom takes a selfie from his vantage point in Steerage.

Arriving at the Manistee Golf and Country Club. 

Buying their passes (or whatever they're called) for the reserved 10am tee time.

We had to divide up into two groups of three golfers (something about golf rules, I don't know.) Yours Truly - as a non-golfer - could be an add-on to either group of three, but naturally went with Morgan, Erik and Mitch, while Tom, Omkar and Lonnie followed behind us.

Some random parlor room inside the club house.

We all ordered a few beers from the bar before hitting the greens, which conveniently came in plastic bags filled with ice (each golf kart had built in coolers on the passenger side, which was super handy.)

Kicking off a few hours of golf.

Trusty mounts. I drove in a kart with Mitch, but I was adamant about driving.

I took some slow-motion video of the dudes in my group hitting off on the second hole. . .

We couldn't have asked for better weather today - it was sunny in the high 70s, perfect polo-and-shorts weather. Super comfortable, not sweaty but still able to tan.

One of the reasons why the guys wanted to hit up this particular golf course was that it sits directly on Lake Michigan (which you can see in the background, there.)

Our group for the day. Mitch, Erik, Yours Truly, and Morgan.

Mitch was saying that this course was only so-so, that the main draw was the lake appeal - other than that the course itself was kinda boring. At least that's what he says. I wouldn't be able to tell you, because I think golf is lame.

While the guys played a nearby hole, I attempted (in vain) to set my phone on the front of the golf kart so we could set it on a timer for a group pic. It kept falling, and other golfers were starting to approach our hole, so we decided we'd attempt to get a group pic later on at a future, waterside hole.

The other guys insisted I get a pic like I'm golfing. I don't even know if I'm holding the club right.

Pretty awesome beach here . . . not that any of us felt up to plummeting down the cliffs to get to it.

Continuing on through the course. . .

The other group gets a selfie in front of the water. Omkar, Lonnie, and Tom.

Swing and a miss. . .

Some more slow-motion, golf swing vids. . .

Whoever designed this logo should have been dragged out into the street and beaten to death with their own shoes.

I was in charging of streaming our Brocation '24 Playlist (that I once again curated, using everyone's 25 selected song picks for the year and assembling a giant, compiled playlist) since I wasn't golfing. I was more than cool with this.

Me and Mitch's bags.

Morgan tees off.

. . . . and Erik.

Erik hit his ball across the street at one point and had to run into some guy's front lawn in order to retrieve his ball. Good thing he didn't break a frickin' window or something. . .

(Mitch is really good at golf. Which does make sense seeing how he's a golf pro.)

Back at the water.

Don't have to tell me twice, sign.

This is pretty much all I do.

More scenic shots of the water.

Again, these guys insisted I pose with a golf club. You know, because I love golf so damn much.

We finally got a full group pic at one of the holes, but since we didn't have anything to prop a phone up with (or a stranger we could ask to take the pic), we had Morgan do a selfie. He's the tallest and has the longest limbs, so that's usually the best way to go.

Pushing into the final stretch of the course.

The Pro

Just a couple of dudes in their late 40's, tuckin' their shirts in to their shorts.

At one hole the other three were right behind us, so I figured it'd be a good idea to snap a couple pics of these dudes golfing as well.

We got a little bottle-necked on the last hole due to some jackasses ahead of us taking their sweet ass time.

Mitch is grumpy.

Back at the clubhouse, hours later.

After loading up all our gear back into the cars, we drove into Manistee to kill some time at a bar - our rental check-in time was still an hour or two away.

(Tom wanted a pic of me in front of this fountain, so I posed as best I could.)

This place was dead when we waltzed in, but the drink and food options were decent.

We spread out across the bar and some of the guys ordered appetizers along with their drinks.

This took me a hot minute, not gonna lie.

(I'm assuming this is some kinda city map. . .?)

One of those assholes (most likely Mitch) thought it'd be funny to slap a sticker on my back. Fortunately we didn't venture out in public with it still on.

Heading back to the car. . .

Just a bunch of middle aged dudes, listening to weird music.

Big Balls can literally fall asleep anywhere, it's insane.

Arriving at our rental for the weekend - Mitten Flats - we finally rendezvoused with Collier, who had driven out after getting out of work.

From the parking lot we had to walk down this narrow alley between two rentals in order to access our condo.

Home Sweet Home.

This place was nice, but pretty Spartan: one large, central room, and two bunkrooms - each with their own bathroom - splitting off to either side of it.

We hadn't determined who was rooming with who beforehand (which is weird, because we always do), so as folks walked towards the rental it became obvious to everyone that this was descending into a 'first come, fist served' situation. Mitch was the first through the door, then Yours Truly, and when I saw Mitch veer off into this room, I made sure to follow him: he doesn't snore, and with only one bed remaining the odds of a snorer getting stuck with us was minimal, seeing how the other room was wide open still. Tom had the same idea, and he followed right on my heels, claiming the last bed. Morgan wasn't thrilled to be stuck with Lonnie and Omkar - two notoriously bad snorers - in the other room, and I did feel bad, seeing how he's usually my bunkmate. Hopefully next year we're more organized.

Walking tour of the rental.

Establishing headquarters.

Tom attempts to hook up a Roku stick to our room's TV.

The other room (a.k.a. The Bullet Dodged.)

The Kings of the Hill always make sure to have enough bourbon on hand.

Finally gave Mitch back a spoon that he had left at our house from last year's Halloween Party.

The sign out front.

The rental above us was pretty quiet - they were a family I think - but they stomped about instead of walking like normal-ass people.

Before heading downtown for dinner, we decided to check out and rec the beach and waterfront.

We had settled on this particular rental because it was only two blocks away from the beach, which was super convenient.

Ludington Beach.

Tom, Morgan, and a lighthouse.

Punk rock.

Despite the nice weather, it wasn't too busy when we got there. Maybe 'cause it was getting to dinner time, who knows.

Before heading back to the condo and dinner, we decided to walk out on the pier and check out the lighthouse at the end.

 No guardrails to speak of on the walk out. Falling on these rocks would hurt like a motherf***er.

Morgan and Tom

It was crazy to see the contrast between the two sides of the pier: super choppy water on one side, while on the other - protected by the pier itself - the water remains eerily calm.

The lighthouse kinda looks like a boat, right?

This door has seen some shit in its day. . .

Once we got down to the end we just kinda stood around for a bit, not much to do at the end of a pier.

Yet another lighthouse. There are three within walking distance from the beach, it's nuts.

Backside of the the lighthouse.

This old dude followed us down the pier, broke out a chair, then just stared out at the shoreline without saying anything. You'd think he'd face the open water instead, and not, you know, the shore that he literally just walked from.

Tom decided to jump in the water, like a frickin' madman.

He tried to get others to follow him in, but nobody else was having it.

Back at the condo, about to load into the Expedition (which could now, thanks to all of our stuff being unloaded in the rental, accommodate all seven of us.)

Heading downtown for food.

Piling out of the Battle Wagon. We found parking in one of those random communal parking lots that faces the backsides of multiple stores and restaurants (it was pretty busy this evening in downtown Ludington.)

Not sure who suggested this place, but I'm assuming it was Erik or Mitch - along with myself, they're the ones who usually plan things in advance.

Tom leaves our name and party size upon check-in - there was a half hour wait when we arrived, so we decided to just have some drinks and wait it out.

The place was packed, and there wasn't enough room anywhere for all of us. Some folks found a couple empty stools at the bar, but Collier and I opted to stand.

Lonnie, Morgan and Erik found a bench.

Mitch and Tom. Probably watching golf or something along those lines.

The good thing about waiting so long for a table is that, thanks to a few menus lying around, everyone figured out what they were ordering well in advance. 

Tom gets a little touchy-feely once you put a few beers into him.

When we finally got seated, they put us at a table right by the front window, and across the street was Ludington's Masonic building. You can see the symbols for five, different appendant bodies carved above the windows. Left to Right: the standard square and compass of Blue Lodge, Royal Arch's keystone, the trowel of Cryptic Council, the crown of Commandery (Knights Templar), and the Eastern Star. I'm a member of the first two and the fourth (the standard Masonic body, plus Royal Arch and Commandery - Cryptic Council is lame.)

As we waited for food, my eye was acting up again, the light especially bothering me. Ever since I had ophthalmologist shingles, my right cornea is scarred. Usually it's not an issue, and there's no risk of it getting worse, but the damage is done - once and awhile, my eye gets super sensitive to light and it feels like there's something in my contact (there isn't.) This weekend it popped up from time to time, but I was able to wear contacts the whole time.

Dinner time, at long last.

(I went with a half order of nachos, which came out looking like an order and a half - it pays to have a small appetite, gang.)

Shot of the back door sign on our way out an hour or so later. After the restaurant, we headed back to the rental and everyone went to bed - five of the guys were waking up at 4am for their charter fishing trip, and folks were in much need of sleep as it was. Stay tuned, folks. . .

to be continued. . .