Bay City by Bus

What's up, gang.

So one of the moms in our friend group - Mees - turned 40 today, and, seeing how it's this friend group and everything, and we have a tendency of going all out on folks' 40th birthdays (the moms', at any rate - we dads are a low-key about that sorta thing), no expenses were spared in order to commemorate the event.

After depositing all of our children off with assorted grandparents, relatives, and other such babysitters, all participating couples for the evening rendezvoused over at the Collier residence for a quick dinner before we really kicked things off.  The Colliers bought about two dozen appetizers from a local sports bar, Big E's - multiple pizza pin wheels, wings, nachos, you name it - basically feeding twenty adults for free.

As the womenfolk wrapped up eating, Mees opened up some of her gifts from the rest of the moms.  In return, she gave each of them personalized, Office-themed drinking cups (which most of them used quite extensively throughout the evening.)  From L to R: Susan, Amy, Kris, Danielle, Kelli, Renee (Ryan's sister), Justin (who's basically one of the wives, one of Mees' friends growing up), and Mees.

The Dads.  From L to R: Ryan, Omkar, Morgan, Tom, Mitch, and Erik (clearly I'm not in this one, as I'm taking the pics.)

Hear hear.

So what plans were in store for our party this evening?  This right here, folks:  a full-blown party bus.  Here Ryan is finaglin' with the driver over last minute details. 

As if supplying us all with free food and booze wasn't enough, the Colliers also bought everyone enough booze to drown a small army - something that was much appreciated in this group.

One group shot - courtesy of the driver - before setting out on an evening on wheels.

We hit the road around 7pm for Bay City.  The plan was to stop off at three bars, and get as much out of the bus and the multiple coolers of drinks as possible.  Everyone was more than fine with this.

Heading down US-10.  Not surprisingly, the men and women were segregated on opposite ends of the bus, just like a Junior High dance. . .

The Birthday Girl steps off at our first stop - Woody O'Briens.

A small group of us (myself included) headed in to use the bathroom, and upon entering the place we realized that there were no tables available to sit our somewhat gargantuan group.

So we snapped this random group picture (thanks, Ryan) before setting off for an alternative watering hole.

Venturing through Bay City.

Morgan, Deanna, Kris, Mees and Amy.

Closing in on our first stop of the night. . .

Some old-timey dive called Mac's.

Me and the ol' ball-and-chain.

And with someone else's phone (the phone's angle in this one makes it look like I have Size-19 feet.)

The interior of this place was super cool - like straight out of the '30s or something.

Houghs.

The dads all sat at one table, and the wives at another.  Per the usual.

The wives all got a huge kick out of the Womens' restroom - apparently there were multiple chairs just hanging out in there.  Like these two - feat. Mees and Kris - over by the sinks.

Ryan's sister, Renee, and her friend that she brought along for the evening (I forget her name), demonstrating how to use the toilet and. . . um. . . the co-toilet chairs in one of the stalls.

Awaiting drinks at the girls' table (feat. Tom and Justin.)

Checking out some of the bar decor.

A round of lemon drop shots with the girls.

Mees, Kris, and Danielle.

The Heroes Table.  L to R: Tom, Yours Truly, Mitch, Morgan, Ryan, and Omkar.

Erik and Mitch, not amused.

Ryan, Tom and Omkar.

So if you look up at the previous picture of Erik and Mitch, you'll notice a weird door on the wall right behind them.  At some point, I insisted they open it up so we could see what was behind it, aaaaaaaaaand this is what we discovered.  Pretty terrifying.

After about 45 minutes or so at that place, we called the bus for transport to another watering hole.

Back on the road. . .

Those coolers barely have a dent in 'em at this point.

Next on our tour:  The Stables Martini Bar.  This bar also had a pretty cool interior - it was built inside what used to be Bay City's municipal stables, and where the horse stalls used to be were now private sitting areas with couches and what-not.  Pretty awesome.

Danielle and Mees charm up the bartender.

It was an open-karaoke night, coincidentally, but the only person in our group that participated was Justin, whom I guess is big into musical theater. . . or something.

Of course.

The sign posted outside the Men's restroom.  Clearly I'm in the right place. . .

Folks, this isn't a random stall in the restroom:  this IS the men's restroom. Definitely a far-cry from the women's bathroom at Mac's, that's for damn sure.

Me and Ryan

More of this.

Omkar ordered us a hookah to share for a bit while folks danced and finished their drinks.  A lot of us dads are big fans of hookahs.

Mitch and Tom.

Morale high.

Back aboard the party bus, heading out to our final destination of the night.

Amy, Kelli, and Susan.

Masons.

Digging into Jello shots.

Omkar and Tom.

I forget the name of this place, but it was far and away the dads' least favorite stop of the night.  It reminded me of the Wayside in Mt. Pleasant - one of those bars that admitted people 18 and older.  This meant that, for whatever reason, security to enter was ridiculously tight:  they confiscated the pocket knives that Erik, Ryan and I were carrying as we entered, locking them into a box for safe-keeping.  None of us were happy about this at all - we're not 15-year-olds, and our knives are consequently over $100 apiece.  I guess there had been fights here in the past, seeing how it's a teenage shit-show of an establishment, and this uncalled-for was pretty shitty - unfortunately we had no choice but to surrender them, because our wives by this point had already strolled right in.

Kelli, Kris, Renee, Amy, and whoever Renee's friend is.

Erik, Mitch, Tom, Yours Truly, and Morgan.

So half of this bar was that green room you've seen in previous pictures. The other half of the bar was a full-blown club with a dance floor, so the moms all headed over that way almost immediately.  After having a beer and being bored out of our damned minds, me and Erik tried walking over to collect them so we could head back onto the bus. . . only to be stopped by a bouncer who barred our entry and said we could not enter while wearing our hats.  What kind of bullshit establishment is this??

Back in the green room, waiting for the moms to wrap up.

After an hour, we finally got all the wives collected and waited outside for the bus to show up (where Tom and Justin shared a hug. . . for some reason.)  When we got back outside, Erik, Ryan, and I went to collect our knives from the bouncer and he simply handed us the lock box.  Inside were like six or seven knives, ours (fortunately) still inside.  There was absolutely nothing to stop some 19-year-old douchebag from going to collect his own $15 mall pocket knife and snatch one of our pricier ones instead (seriously, all the other knives in there were garbage, it would've been easy for some punk to grab our nicer ones instead.)  This oversight on the part of security was beyond infuriating. 

Boarding the party bus for the return trip to Midland.

While cruising down US-10 for home, the stripper pole in the bus finally got some use. . . from boths wives and dads.

Behold: the mother of my children. (Got cut off a bit.)

Typical party bus footage.

At the end of the night, most of the rest of the folks headed off for home.  A few of us stayed back for one last drink and to eat cake (or whatever it was, I didn't have any.)

And that's how yet another one of our friend group entered their Middle Ages.  See ya next time, America.

- Brian