The Great Christmas Record Odyssey, Ep. LI

Don't kid yourself, America.  You know you missed this.

It's that time once again, folks.  We're in the Holiday Pre-Season.  Halloween is long, past dead, and even though we've yet to run that whole Thanksgiving gauntlet. . . who cares.  It's not like Thanksgiving is a real holiday anyway.

Do you see end-caps at Meijer or Target advertising Thanksgiving merch, aside from hand-towels?  No?  Well, there you have it.  Not a real holiday.

Now as we've discussed here in this blog in previous years, the Holiday Pre-Season here in the Hough household brings about one of my favorite yuletide traditions:  the audio-scrutinization of every, last Christmas LP I own.  I dig out all of my Holiday vinyl (which, over the last few years, has gotten to be quite substantial indeed) and put aside the tried-and-true classics for repeated use in my designated Crate of Yuletide Awesomeness.  Check it out:

There's about thirty or so LPs that get to chill out in this place of honor, and these are ones that I play on a pretty regular basis throughout the Holiday season.  Other albums that I still consider worth keeping, deem mandatory classics, or otherwise don't find myself playing a lot - like Christmas with the Chipmunks, or Disney's Christmas All-Time Favorites (call me crazy, I don't have a hankerin' for children's music all that much anymore) - are put away safely in storage for Christmases yet-to-come (say, when I have grandkids or something.)

This Battle Station is fully operational.  Bring on the Holidays, motherf***ers.

I keep a separate crate of unplayed, untried, and untested Holiday vinyl off to the side, atop my sub-woofer (see picture.)  As each Christmas record is tried out on my turntable, it either a.) finds its way into the Crate of Yuletide Awesomeness, b.) is kept shelved away in storage for future Christmases, or c.) it's thrown in the 'Donate to Goodwill/Sell to Radio Wasteland' pile.  Each album is given careful consideration and scrutiny, which I then disclose to you, dear reader, in hopes of saving you the trouble of going through this process on your own.

Granted, I'm sure I'm one of, like, six people on Earth that undertake this endeavor, buuuut. . . I think it's worth it.

And so, with my reintroduction to the Craft being once again given, nestle in by the fire, pour yourself a holly, jolly egg-nog (I take mine with rum), and let's set off once again on this, our Great Christmas Record Odyssey. . .

Album Title:  Christmas Songs

Album Artist:  Bad Religion

For this, my 51st record that I've reviewed on this Odyssey, we hit the ground running.

That kid's so damn happy he got shoes for Christmas. . .

Bad Religion, for those of you not familiar with punk rock - the genre, the scene, the culture - are one of those few bands that are universally respected, if not adored, by everyone.  I can count on one hand the few other bands in punk rock that are just as well universally praised:  Operation Ivy, The Clash, The Misfits. . . that might be it.  Bad Religion have been around since the early '80s, and as elder statesmen, perform with the experience and credibility of a band that gives zero f***s whether or not you like them or buy their music.

Only one side of this album has music - kind of a short list.

This freedom to focus on music has given their sound a weight that many bands in the genre lack.  Greg Gaffin, their lead singer and principle songwriter, sings with a battle-worn conviction that few bands today - in any genre - can match.  This is one of the reasons why the far-fetched concept of a well-respected, universally-loved punk band covering Christmas standards works.

For example, the vocals on 'O Come All Ye Faithful' reverberate like a street anthem - a rallying cry for revolutionaries and Holiday cocktail aficionados alike.  You can pump your fist to it:  Greg's not just singing a seasonal song, folks.  Listening to this you believe he means lives and breathes every word of the song.

So, this album is good, and I'd even say some of the tracks are great. . . but I can't see myself giving this one above an '8' rating.

One of the greatest labels in punk music. . .

Here's the main reason why:  they keep the tempo and sound the same throughout the entirety of the album, with little variation.  Granted, punk rock is supposed to be fast and/or hard - it's the soundtrack to skateboarding, mosh pits, driving too fast down the highway, overthrowing a government, etc.  But, from start-to-finish, across an entire album - filled with many songs that are performed traditionally slow - can get tiresome.  Giving songs a 'punk cover' was all the rage in the '90s, and some bands - looking at YOU, Me First and the Gimme Gimmes - totally made a career out of taking old songs, speeding them up, and singing them in a 'punk' way.

This is the first CD I've owned since 2006. . .

Gaffin, as a solo artist, has recorded a couple really solid country/folk, Americana-punk albums that are hauntingly good (Millport, Cold as the Clay, etc.)  Had he gotten Bad Religion behind that style instead and given a few of these tracks that kind of treatment, this album could've instantly become a modern classic.

Instead, I'm more than happy to settle for it being really, really good.

VERDICT:  8/10 - Awesome (Punk rock elder statesmen pump out a badass Christmas album and don't give a f***  about slowing down occasionally for variety's sake.)

- REMAINS IN CIRCULATION -