Laps Around the Block

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

Scooby, Velma and Daphne

Okay, so we have a month of build-up leading up to Halloween - the entire month of October - all devoted to a mere hour or so of running around the block a few times, knocking on neighbors' doors and asking for handouts.

Like Christmas, the build-up to Halloween itself is starting to become more fun than the actual holiday itself anymore.  Trick or Treating is over so damn fast that afterward, while your kids are watching crappy Halloween specials and gorging themselves on processed sugary garbage, you start to question if the hours and hours of house decorating, the multiple trips to Halloween City, Meijer, Target and Walmart, the costume purchases in-store and online, and obligatory quest to find and mutilate pumpkins is all worth it.

Okay, that's stupid.  Of course it is.

This year the weather was significantly better than last year's freezing rain crapfest, so the girls wanted to be out and about more.  Unfortunately for all parties involved, Halloween fell on a Monday night this year, so it was a school night for three of us. . .

. . . and trust me when I say that there's no greater hell on Earth than a Middle School classroom the day after Halloween.

Okay, maybe Valentine's Day.

Behold. . .

The Haunted Not-So-Mansion

Ready to take Watson around the block for some candy acquisition. . .

Reba and Sophie had already carpeted a few houses before swinging by to meet up with our girls. . .

Like last year, Kris volunteered to take the girls around the block first, while I stayed behind to watch Kung Fury and pass out Halloween Candy, then we'd switch places. . . which is exactly how we started things this year.

(This pumpkin beer was a little hoppy for my taste. . . probably wouldn't do it again.)

Ivy Squad

After their first lap around the block, I left our bowl of candy out on the porch, locked the dog back up in the house, and joined the neighborhood pack of kids and adults for a second lap around the block.  Needless to say, it was pretty hard to keep up with these guys.

I kinda wish I had taken the girls out around the block first, and had Kris stay back and pass out candy, 'cause Kris didn't take any pictures while it was still somewhat light out, and so all of our trick-or-treat pictures are, well, pretty shitty.  Next year I'll be sure to remedy that, America. . .

 

Is this a good look on me?

Back at the house, ready to call it a night. . .

The girls begin tearing through their candy while watching some Halloween movies (and while I pick out all the crap that we don't want them to eat, or that's questionable in nature - all that stuff I'll end up taking to my classroom to give out to other people's kids. . .)

This dog's a mooch.

- Brian

Carving Pumpkins

Happy Nearly-Halloween, America!

So, as you know, this weekend for us was, well, insane.  School parties, neighborhood house parties, lesson plan parties (oh, wait.)  Anyway, by Sunday evening we were all pretty exhausted and tired and not looking forward to another week of work and school.  We had already started winding the kids down for the evening, getting them - and us - into pajamas, when we suddenly realized, much to our dismay, that we had forgotten to carve the f***ing Halloween pumpkins.

Like a bunch of champs.

Trick or Treating would be tomorrow after work/school, so we were forced to do it tonight, regardless of how much - ooooh, how much - we did NOT want to do it.

This may be the fastest blitzkrieg of a pumpkin-carving session the Houghs have ever had.

Behold:

The gutting process begins

The girls are getting pretty good at handling knives - we didn't have to help them out at all this year.

Kris made a pumpkin with braces this year - she's in orthdonics, folks - so, of course, both kids wanted braces on their pumpkins as well.

Abby and her finished product

From left to right:  the party pumpkin (the one that had dip coming out of its mouth), Alayna's pumpkin, mine, Abby's, and Kris'.

The Hough Family's 2016 Halloween Pumpkins

- Brian

A Monster Mash

Greetings, Ghosts and Ghouls. . .

So Kris and I up and decided that we'd attempt hosting our very first Halloween Party this year.

Our neighborhood collection of moms had originally envisioned some kind of block party for Saturday night, but after weeks of casually talking about it without anything definitive being put in stone, Kris decided to put on her fancy hosting pants and take matters into her own hands.  A Facebook Event page was created, moms were invited, Pinterest crap was shared with great relish, and guest lists were expanded.

Before you knew it, we had about fifty costumed people hanging out in our house. And nothing was broke, stolen, or vomited on.

We're now looking ahead at Christmas parties.

Check it out. . .

A Pinterest-heavy Halloween spread of snacks and treats.  It should go without saying that I was in no way involved with any of this, whatsoever.

Yes, that's the Houghs.  We're Mystery Incorporated.

Left to Right:  Fred, Daphne, Shaggy, Scooby Doo, and Velma.

Some of our girls' neighborhood squad.  We bought this cheap-o background and borrowed Chris and Nicole's vistaprint/polaroid printer, which you can sync up to a smartphone, so that party guests could print off Halloween Polaroids throughout the evening. . .

Adults didn't use it as much as we anticipated, but, in hindsight, it was hung pretty low. . .

Kid-friendly Halloween cocktails= big hit

My brother as the legendary Bob Ross.

We had a shitload of kids in our house.  I'm so happy I had a vasectomy. . .

After an hour or so of inside craziness, the kids began running laps around the house, war-whooping like a bunch of Apaches gone mad.  It would have pissed off the neighbors, I'm sure, had not the entire neighborhood already been inside our house. . .

No one knew who this guy was.  Everyone just assumed he came with someone else.

Some various neighbor pics. . .

I made sure to lock up all the valuable - both monetarily and sentimentally - retro video games systems in the back storage room, and hooked up the PS2  in the basement for 'crowd control.'  I knew we'd have a lot of boys on hand for this party, and therefore the usual Barbie and Playmobil fare the girls usually play with probably wouldn't cut it.  This foresight was incredibly successful.

After a few hours, as it got later and later, the adults migrated to our back and front porches, freeing up the living room for the kids.  We dimmed the lights and put in a movie so they could start winding down.  Kids started falling asleep all over the damn place, so this bought us a couple more hours of hang-out time.

Spent.

- Brian

MackMellen's Hitchin'

The Amway Grand Hotel

Who's ready for a Kris-less and kid-less blog post?

My youngest cousin, Mackenzie, had a wedding this weekend, and usually that's the sort of thing that Kris and I would go to together, sans kids.  Alas, Kris is currently in Denver for her work (some dental conference of some kind), so I went stag this time around. . . which was pretty fun.

After dropping the girls and the dog off with my mom Saturday morning, I set off for hipster-ly Grand Rapids and some Waite family nuptials.

Check it out. . .

The drive down was pretty uneventful, but the block or two of city driving once I got off the downtown exit was downright brutal.  Once I managed to fight my way into my hotel's parking garage, I got to cross one of these little catwalk deals. . . which always gives me mild vertigo, passing over streets and moving cars and everything.

The Amway Grand Hotel (this place is slightly swankier than what I'm accustomed to.) 

Front Lobby.  I arrived around the same time as Dad and Cindy, so we all retired to our rooms to throw on our suits and get ready for the wedding, which was about two hours away. ..

View from my room (that's the Grand River - I think that's what it's called - off to the right, there.)

My room.  It's an older hotel, so the room size is smaller, but everything in it is pretty premium.  Super nice room, if not a little old-fashioned.

Command Center:  established.

Once we were all suited up, we all met down in the lobby and carpooled over to the wedding ceremony in Cindy's SUV.  We all had VIP seating in the second row on Mackenzie's side, with a blank, empty row reserved solely for the Flower Girl (seriously.)  Dad (who took this pic) and Cindy were on some couch-thing off to the side, practically up next to Mackenzie in the ceremony.  I had never seen a setup like this in a wedding before.

Maiwwage. . .

. . . is wut bwings us too-geathuh, too-dai.

Following a nice but somewhat-longer-than-expected ceremony (where practically everyone in attendance read some vow, prayer, quote or anecdote off a piece of paper, and there were approximately two-dozen musical interludes), we went upstairs for cocktails while the bridal party had pictures taken.  Both the ceremony and the reception were held in this abandoned warehouse-turned-trendy venue, which sounds weird but appears to be pretty run-of-the-mill for Grand Rapids.

Not pictured:  Kris, Jeff, Annie, Bryan, and many offspring.

After an hour or two of cocktails and standing around, it was time to shuffle back downstairs, where the warehouse folks had broken out the dinner tables.  All the siblings, spouses, Dad and Cindy were all seated together, which was nice and convenient, so after everyone had their obligatory 'couples' picture taken at the table, I made sure they got one of me and my Denver-based spouse.

Following several drinks, the bridal party arrived (unfortunately not to the theme music from Raiders of the Lost Ark, like some totally awesome people I know. . .)

Food took a bit to come out, but the booze helped keep us occupied.

Dinner itself was really good, and as the meal wore on they dimmed lights and started the dance party (in which no Houghs partook.)

Lil' Macker

Dad lecturing Cindy's sister, Sue. . . on. . . something

Chris and Nicole sent me this pic from the now-empty upstairs cocktail area, which was still accessible and much quieter than the downstairs reception.  Earlier in the evening, between the ceremony and the reception, they had an open cocktail bar and a jazz trio playing upstairs, which was awesome.  So, now that we had the place to ourselves, the Hough family migrated upstairs where we could stretch out on the couches and actually hear ourselves talk.

Some pretty awesome decor in this joint, that's for sure.

Brian, Nicole and Jill.  Deep in their cups.

Jill and I might have played this a bit.  Pretty badass-looking piano, but definitely out of tune.

What can I get for ya, Stretch?

It was awesome having this whole upper floor to ourselves

This was one those old 77 rpm record players - we managed to get it working, too.  Not the greatest sound, but rocking out to jams from the 1920s and '30s is always fun.

Mackenzie and her new husband, Matt, had a big, blank stretch-canvas - with this one, lone image in the bottom right corner - set out for party guests to sign with their names and well-wishes.  I made sure to sign my name in my best handwriting, right where they could see it.

The Houghs decided to call it quits a few hours into the reception, but posed for this pretty classy photo op on the way out.  I like to think we clean up pretty good.

Back at the hotel, heading across the catwalk with a few boxes of pizza taken from the wedding reception.

I mean, it's no Doherty Hotel, but we got by.

The end of a fun wedding.  Really, really glad I didn't have to Parent at all throughout the evening.

- Brian