The Houghs: 2014

Hi, America.

As the world prepares to wrap up yet another year of awesomeness and lameness, hilarity and chaos, good, bad and ugly, we here at the Houghs leave you with one, last installment of monthly randoms from our day-to-day existence.

Enjoy.

As I was waiting at red light in Kissimmee on my drive home after work, I glanced over at the left-hand side of the road and noticed something really, really creepy at the base of a street sign. . .

Come to think of it, I don't think this was taken in December, but I'm just now stumbling across this, so we'll just pretend it was taken this month - I don't feel like putting a lot of thought and effort into this. Here we have Abby bustin' balls at Sunchild's soccer program.

And here's the other kid.

Another Lions game on in Florida? You know Detroit's having a good year when you're able to watch multiple Lions games from the bowels of America's Wang.

Found this in my briefcase at work. My students found it hilarious.

Ending the Machete Order with Return of the Jedi, which, coincidentally, ended up being the girls' favorite Star Wars flick. I attribute this to a certain, adorable, market-friendly race of plucky aliens from the forest moon of Endor. . .

All dolled up for a not-planned visit with Dr. Eckert at All Star Pediatrics. FYI - this is her make-up job (though it's better than I could do, so I can't make fun of her too much.)

As it turns out, Alayna had Strep Throat. Hooray.

Strep Throat means days and days of this bullshit.

Putting on a rock concert for the family in the living room (and nothing's more rock and roll than that creepy-ass cat shirt, right?)

Introducing the girls to hot chocolate (YES, they had never had it before - gimme a break, we live in Florida.)

Kris took the girls toy-shopping for Toys for Tots (to Toys R Us, I believe), if only to show the kids the importance of donating to those in need, the 'reason for the season,' 'spirit of giving,' blah blah blah.

The kids did a pretty good job with it, too. . . after they got over the whole 'this is for poor kids, not for you' thing.

Time for Santa. Alayna's about to shit a brick.

Workin' over the boss man.

CHEAP STICKERS AND CANDY

Happy Kwanzaa, y'all.

And now it's time for a bunch of weird pictures, courtesy of the Cannonball. . .

Butts are HILARIOUS.

Alayna's new, favorite selfie face.

Here's another favorite.

I'm handsome.

Abby passes out watching a movie. . .

She's lucky her sister hasn't discovered the joy of drawing on passed out people with a Sharpie yet. . .

A care package of Christmas cookies, fudge, and other sugary awesomeness from Grandma Jordan. Watson plans his move.

Preparing for Pajama Day at Sunchild Academy, the last day before Christmas break starts. . .

Not sure if this Santa or the previously pictured bloke from the Florida Mall is the real Santa - someone should have looked into this.

The girls from Abby's VPK class.

(Just so you know, this bath crayon disaster was on the tub for a couple weeks.)

One day over Christmas break, when Kris was at work, I took the girls out to Bass Pro Shops Outdoor World at the Festiva Bay Mall on International Drive. . .

For those of you not in the know, this place is like Jay's Sporting Goods on crack. They sell everything and anything for all outdoor activities - hunting, fishing, camping, hiking, boating, etc. I was looking for ammo clips for a pistol I recently purchased (I'll have to tell you guys about that some other time), and figured the girls would enjoy running around the store and checking out some of the outdoor stuff.

Every time I come here, I somehow end up having to explain to the girls why they don't need an ATV.

Checking out the fish in a giant rock aquarium at the center of the store.

Checking out some tents. . .

This thing was awesome - sure, it cost $300, but it was pretty high quality and would be perfect for camping with little kids. Something to keep in mind.

Leaving Outdoor World, and heading out to blow some leftover gift cards from Christmas. . .

Alayna's got a loose tooth (one of her front center ones on the bottom), but the adult tooth is already growing in behind it. Kris wanted to make sure everything was cool, so we took her to the dentist just to play it safe. Turns out everything's normal and her teeth are in good shape.

I'm pissed I didn't grab my SLR sooner - there were six vultures on the roof of our neighbors house originally, but two flew away by the time I got back to the window with a telephoto lens. . .

Alayna's really been enjoying the make-up kit she got for Christmas - she volunteers to do Abby's make-up all the time. . .

Disgusting creatures.

Here's a stop-animation of one right here.

Remember this movie? It's from the same people that made Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and coincidentally he stars in this spin-off disaster. The plot's all over the damn place, but it centers around this Dumbo-esque child of incest (I'm assuming) hopping around through time, and Rudolph and a hodge-podge assortment of plucky sidekicks from history have to track the kid down before the vulture eats him. . . or something. I don't know. Don't watch this movie, it's painful.

After watching the horrible, horrible movie previously described, Kris and I decided to let the kids stay up as late as they wanted for the New Years Eve thing they do in Times Square every year (knowing full well the girls would both be passed out by 9pm anyway.)