Friday, January 31, 2020

DAMN-uary

Welcome back to the ongoing saga, boys and girls.

This has definitely been a slooooow month, and I, for one, am sincerely grateful.  After the Holiday blitzkrieg, we really needed some down time around here.  The month of January seems to have a lot in common with September, in that they both are devoted to returning to the usual school/work grind after taking considerable time off to lounge around the house, gaining weight.  Yours Truly has stayed on top of running on the treadmill since October, but even that didn't stop me from putting on a few pounds (thanks to all the Holiday parties, filled with delicious and unhealthy food and booze.)  We're not big on resolutions in this family, but getting back into healthy eating habits was paramount this month.

There were some other notable events that happened this month.  A euchre tournament at the Collier's, a couple Girl Scout outings, and, of course, my ascension to the highest rank of Masonry:  Master Mason.  I achieved this rank in a very short amount of time, as I studied religiously for this final degree, and now that I'm officially a highest-ranking member in the Freemasons, I can go on to explore some of the appending bodies of Masonry (York Rite, Scottish Rite, Shriners, etc.)  I'll keep you posted with those developments as they transpire.

Oh yeah, and we got another dog.  He's a pain in the ass, so he fits right in.

In closing, here's some pictures of the four-and-a-half months that was January.

Enjoy.

So here's a picture of my lodge (the top floor, the left half of the building), around one hundred and fifty years ago (it turns 150 in April, technically.)
Shortly after the Holidays settled down, Kris bought some white paint to redo Abby's bedroom.  No longer into Star Wars (sad as that is), she'd been wanting a beach-themed bedroom, and the formerly dark grey walls weren't really giving off that vibe.  Kris was able to really lighten up the room with a couple coats of primer and a couple additional coats of paint.  I didn't help out with this in any way, shape or form.
While Kris was painting her room, Abby got to hang out with some friends at the Roll Arena.
 
Decor getting thrown up on the walls (okay, I did that part.)
A beach-themed picture display above her dresser, lights courtesy of Dad and Cindy.
A far cry from the greys and purples of her pre-renovated room. . .
Both girls have been really into sewing lately, thanks to my mom, who showed them how to do it one day over at her house.  She gave them needles and various threads, along with random fabrics so they can practice and make God knows what.
 
The Larsons' kid, Sophie, hanging out one day for some more f***ing sewing. . .
I came home from work one day to find these signs plastered all over the door to our basement.  I blame the spelling on their Farwellian mother's genes.
Running around the neighborhood one afternoon, following a nasty ice storm that coated everything in dangerous ice (to the point where we had the kids put on helmets if they were running around the sidewalks.)
One of the gifts Abby got from my mom for Christmas this year was a gift certificate to Build-a-Bear (where kids can custom-build their own stuffed animal from scratch.)  Unfortunately, the closest location was down in Grand Rapids, in some mall in Grandville.  So one Saturday we drove down in the morning to get Abby her Goddamned stuffie. . .
Taking an elevator down to the first floor (this mall was slightly more fancy that the Midland Mall.)
Let the up-selling begin. . .
After picking out her animal's 'skin' (for lack of better term), it was time to get the animal filled with stuffing.  Abby went with a rainbow-colored cat.
 
This whole process is so frickin' bizarre. . .
Hooking the cat up to the fluff tube.
No idea what's happening here.
Abby places a red heart into the corpse, thereby giving it life.
(This isn't a real bath.)
Once they sell you a $25 stuffed animal - with options to pick a scent for $5, a heart for $5, an audio recording for $10, etc. etc. - you then get to pick out an outfit.  Rest assured, each article of clothing costs about $5 apiece, so one drops $50 on one f***ing stuffed animal real quick.
Holding up her new, over-priced stuffed cat and a certificate of adoption.
After our nightmare at Build-a-Bear, we swung over to BP's house to hang out with the DeBoer fam for a few hours.  BP recently got into vinyl, and he just completed his setup.  Not bad for a novice.
Awaiting my Master Mason degree at Lodge.
After my initiation ceremony, Erik and I met up with a bunch of other dads over at the Boulevard Lounge for some celebratory beers.
To mark the occasion, I had this custom-made .925 Sterling Silver Masonic ring made on Etsy.
This symbolizes Memento Mori (one of our principles in Masonry.)  Worth the price, for sure.
Finally got around to replacing the cabinet hardware in the kitchen.  Happy Wife, Happy Life.
My lodge donated a bunch of hats and mittens to Chestnut Hill this month, one of our charities that we run every year.
The girls set this up in the living room one evening.  God knows why.
Aldi recently started selling boxed wine.  I'm a happy camper.
Alayna is 11 going on 16 these days.
The girls have been playing a lot of chess lately.  I'm 100% cool with this.
I didn't know such a thing existed, but I definitely want one now. . .
One of the rare days this month that actually felt like winter.  It's been eerily warm, and without much snow at all, for most of the month.
Watson shows Samson the ropes.
Samson is obsessed with Abby. . .
Setting up teams for the Colliers' ridiculously-intricate Euchre Tournament.  There was a $10 buy-in for all players, and instead of full-on games, 24 players were scrambled up at random and would play through two deals per player before ending each round in the tournament.  However many points you and your random partner received would then be entered into a spreadsheet (which was displayed via a monitor that Ryan put atop his TV, shown here.)  At the end of nine rounds, whomever won the 1st, 2nd and 3rd places (based on total accumulated points), won $100, $80, and $60, respectively.  The last two point values would have to perform karaoke for everyone else.
For most of the evening, Kris was in the bottom two, and she was mortified at the prospect of singing in front of other people.  This doesn't bother me in the slightest, so - being the chivalrous husband that I am - I told her that if she finished in the bottom two places I'd step in and take her place.  Alas, she finished third-from-last, as Ryan - the host himself - finished second-to-last, and assumed her karaoke spot.  Stephanie ended up finishing dead last, and when she heard of my husbandly gesture, she made her husband, Lonnie, fill in for her.
 
I forget what highly-homosexual duet these two did, but it was damn funny.

- Brian

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