Random Crap Holocaust 2011

I have a humongous headache, folks. Here's why.

We had ourselves the garage sale this morning. And it was absolute chaos. We wanted to start the day off at 8am, so I went around the neighborhood in a mile radius or so, putting up directional 'Garage Sale!' signs and balloons and crap like that. By the time I got home, it was pushing 7am, so I figured I'd have at least an hour to set up the driveway before people started swarming our house.

I was wrong.

Folks began showing up at 7:15am! I hadn't even pulled anything out from the garage onto the driveway and they were digging through our wares. It was ridiculous. Evidently people in Central Florida don't know how to read. Or tell time.

Anyway, overall we had ourselves a pretty good run. We sold all of our big ticket items (items ranging in the $25 - $100 range), which was awesome, which the not-so-surprising exception of three of the four swords I was selling (I don't think God wants me to sell these swords, as I apparently must wield them in the upcoming apocalypse that will surely unfold once gas hits $4 a gallon this summer). We actually probably sold about 70% of the stuff we put out, and although people had to haggle on every, last item that we were selling, we ended up netting $337.60 by 1pm when we called it a day.


Booya!

The only downside to the entire day was the occasional haggle fest we'd get from these Haitian ladies that would constantly want to give you about 10 - 20% of what you were asking. They were after the baby clothes like rabid wolves, and would grab up piles of clothes - which, at Kris' pretty reasonable pricing, would cost about $100 - and want them all for $20.

That happened several times throughout the course of the morning. The first time it happened, Kris gave a woman probably $30 worth of stuff for free without even realizing it. A lady made off with a ton of brand new baby dresses, shoes, towels, etc. in her jumbled pile of clothes.

After that, Kris was on the warpath whenever those types of 'shoppers' showed up, and we didn't get taken by anyone again.

...I mean, seriously. Who the hell haggles 50 cent prices at a garage sale?!

- Brian